Oathkeeper
by SuseliebeSuse
Summary: When Brienne leaves Kingslandig for her mission to find Sansa Stark she recognizes something she would never imagine to happen! Some Braime love, hope you enjoy it.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**  
Okay this is what I wrote in the last hour while I was re-watching GoT (what else can we do, while we wait for Season 8 lol)  
I'm a huge Brienne/Jaime fan and I just think they belong together, I WANT them to be together  
I hope you like this little story of mine.

 **Disclaimer:**  
All publicity recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

 **Chapter One**

When she first felt nausea coming up and made her vomit early in the morning, Brienne thought that maybe Podrick was the worst cook in whole Westeros. So she kept looking over his back the next day he began to cook their small meal. But there was nothing wrong the way he cooked.

The second time nausea overcame her she thought she might get sick and they took a two day rest in a tavern. But it looked like it was just in the early morning hours, so Brienne decided that the journey to the north to find Sansa Stark, had to go on.

Nausea had gone without Brienne realizing it but the next thing she realized - a couple of weeks later - she didn't bleed.

"Shit," she muttered and began to count. She realized that she hadn't bled for a while. But she wasn't that kind of woman who observed her body.

She never needed to.

While she did, she walked up and down the little camp, Podrick, and she had decided to use for the night. Three months since she had left kings landing... since she'd left him.

She'd stayed a month at his home. So it seemed that she was fucking pregnant in the sixth month.

"What's wrong, Mylady?" Podrick came from behind, with a worried look. He was a good guy, although it appeared that he was not very talented with serving her. And she knew she could trust him, Podrick Payn would never betray her.

She hadn't recognized anything else besides nausea, who was gone after a while. Brienne even didn't show, her belly was flat as it ever was.

No sign.

She hadn't searched for a sign of pregnancy either. Never, indeed, she had thought that she would ever get pregnant. For the truth, she never wanted to get pregnant. And it wasn't like she tried to. It had been just this one time she'd been weak. One time as a maiden and now she carried a child without even recognizing it.

* * *

It was after Jaime Lannister, also known as the Kingslayer, saved her, Brienne of Tarth, from the bear's pit and took her with him. Never, in seven hells, she had thought that he would come back. To her. She had such strong feelings towards him at that moment, it was overwhelming.

They went to a little tavern, and Jaime took her by his left hand so that she had to went inside what appeared to be his room.

"Sit down," he told her, and she sat down on his bed which was the only thing she literally could sit down.

"I'll clean your wound."

Brienne looked in his direction. He knew she hated it to get touched by strangers. But Jaime was no stranger anymore. So she nodded and pulled her left arm out of her dress, held it with her right hand in front of her chest.

Jaime moved and sat down beside her, the mattress shifted a little when he did, and Brienne held her breath for a second.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you," his voice was so soft, she could only manage to nod and watched her feet while he cleaned the first scratches which reached from her neck to the throat. He then went to her left upper arm. It hurt very much, but Brienne managed to sit silently at his side until he was ready.

"Thank you.", Brienne managed to say when he stood up.

"I should go, " she said then, but he stopped her when she tried to do so. "I'm sorry, there is no room for you, Mylady, but you can sleep here. I will stay outside."

Brienne turned into his direction, still holding her dress in front of her chest.

"You don't have to stay outside. You're more hurt than I am. I can sleep on the ground, Ser Jaime."

"I don't accept that Brienne," he quietly told her. "This bed is big enough for both of us. I have your clothes here if you need them."

He went over to another topic and gave her a small smile. "We've already seen everything Brienne, there's no reason to be shy."

Brienne blushed, looked away and nodded. He was right, and they both would need a bed tonight. They were tired and exhausted. And today's experiences had been terrifying for her, so she gave no back talk.

She turned her back on Jaime and changed her clothes. She hated dresses in general, but that pink dress was the ugliest one she had ever seen. She threw in the fire what was left of that dress, didn't watch it burn.

Brienne went to bed, Jaime laid there and had left some space for her. She laid on her back, Jaime on his left side. She could feel him watching her.

"Are you okay?", He asked quietly, and Brienne nodded. She had to be okay. "I hope you still have your maidenhood," he said then, and Brienne managed to watch him angrily. But he didn't look amused. He looked worried.

"Why do you want to know that?" She asked him with a softer voice, she realized that he was genuinely caring for her. "But yes," she didn't want to say it, but the words were spoken before she could stop them.

"I care," was the only thing he told her as an answer and closed his eyes. "I'm glad it is," she heard him saying while he drifted into sleep.

* * *

"My lady?"

"What is it, Podrick?" Brienne looked at him.

"I'm worried. You haven't talked for a while know, going up and down here. Is something wrong?"

"I'm afraid, but yes. Something is terribly wrong," Brienne murmured and sat down in front of the fire and sighed in frustration.

"I think my father finally becomes his heir..."

To be continued


	2. Chapter 2

"Excuse me?" Podrick looked as confused as she felt and if it weren't so frustrating, she would have smiled over his face.

"It seems that I am pregnant, Pod," Brienne told him and looked at him.

"I haven't realized yet, but I am."

"That's..." Podrick didn't find any words; he just stared at her.

"Yeah...I know. But now that we are alone, Podrick, you have to help me to bring my child to Tarth as soon as it is born. I cannot raise it as long as Cersei Lannister is alive."

"Cersei? What is it with her?" Podrick managed to ask. He didn't understand, so she had to tell him.

"It's Jaime Lannister's child."

* * *

When she woke up and opened her eyes, she faced him. Jaime was awake and watched her. He had a little smile on his face. "You look so peaceful while you sleep."

She watched him for a while when she saw that he lifted his left hand to her face. Brienne didn't stop him.

He caressed her cheek, and she just looked into his eyes. They had a beautiful color. Brienne hadn't noticed it until now.

Jaime moved his head to hers, very slowly. She wasn't able to speak. And when his lips met hers, when Jaime Lannister claimed Brienne of Tarth's first kiss it felt like a dream to her.

Slowly, almost shy, she kissed him back, felt his hand on her cheek, felt her head becoming dizzy. Indeed, Brienne had never felt that way before.

He kissed her again, and carefully caressed her cheek, after a while her cervical and soon after that, he touched her shoulder.

Brienne knew what was about to come, but she wasn't afraid. To her own surprise, she felt good, indeed.

Their kisses became hungrier, more impatient and she felt him against her belly, as he put his hand on her waist to pull her towards him.

Brienne didn't realize when their clothes left their bodies, but when he caressed her naked waist, she blushed deeply and looked away. Jaime realized it.

"Don't look away, it's alright, you are beautiful. Don't be ashamed."

If it was possible, Brienne blushed in a deeper red. "You told me I am ugly if I remember it right," she said to him, but after a while, she looked at him.

"I was wrong, I'm sorry. You are beautiful, I was an idiot back then, and you know it best. I just realized it too late, as I always do."

He kissed her again and carefully touched her waist again, and this time she wasn't embarrassed. She didn't look away. She believed him.

The following touches made her feel better than she ever did. With a bit time, her hands moved over Jaime's naked body. And she could see, Jaime felt the same way. She'd never seen such an expression on a man's face. At this moment she knew they loved each other.

They didn't break eye contact that night. Every time they loved each other.

The following morning, Jaime held her in his arms as long as they had to stood up. But they weren't allowed to show. She knew it. If Cersei Lannister would get to know it, Brienne of Tarth was a dead woman.

"I don't want you to die," Jaime told her. "So let's keep it a secret for a while."

And Brienne agreed. It would be the best. She stayed at Kingslanding to bring Sansa back to Winterfell, to keep her safe. And Jaime. He kept healing physically. He seemed tense all the time. But they didn't manage to talk often. Cersei appeared to be around them every time.

* * *

"You know this is a bad joke, don't you?" Brienne had almost forgotten what she told Podrick when his answer came.

"It's not a joke Podrick, and I won't tell it again. And you won't too until you go and bring my child to my father. Do you understand that?"

She'd made a plan. Her father would raise her and Jaime's child until she was ready to do it on her own. She would write a letter to him, and he would understand. Brienne knew it. Her father had always known her.

And she couldn't go there on her own, she couldn't break an oath, Brienne had to bring Sansa, and Arya if she was still alive, back to their home. Back to Winterfell.

Brienne sighed. "It's the only way, Podrick."

She could see in his face that he wasn't happy, indeed. She wasn't happy either.

"You can raise it, while you stay in Winterfell," Podrick argued, but Brienne shook her head.

"I can't. Someone will tell the queen. And when she counts, she will know. She won't ask. Cersei will kill my child first, and then me."

But she would tell Jaime. He needed to know. But she couldn't send a raven. The risk was too high that Cersei would read it. She had to wait until they would meet again.

"We are alone now, and we have to plan it now. Podrick, this is important. We can't talk about this as soon as there are other people around us, do you understand that?"

Brienne felt tense and anxious. She needed to keep her and Jaime's child safe. She had to.

"Yes, my lady."

"Alright. Here's the plan. I will give birth in three moons. When the baby is born, I think we will need a few weeks to strengthen it. I have to spend...milk so you can travel with that little child. We will get you a ship, which sails right to Tarth. You will give my child to my father. Only to him, alright? I'll give you a letter for him. He will take care of it until I can do it."

And when she was able to do it by herself, she would tell her child who her father was and that he loved it. Brienne was so sure he would be happy about the news.

She caressed her stomach and sighed. If someone had told her a year back, that she, Brienne of Tarth, would lay with the Kingslayer himself, she would have fought him until he would never say that again.

But Jaime Lannister showed her his real self. He wasn't a Kingslayer. He protected Kingslanding and the people who lived there. The people he loved. Jaime Lannister was one of the good ones. Even if he didn't believe it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note:**  
A little time has passed from now on, I will follow the story for a while but maybe change a few things, but don't know exactly yet. I want to write about important scenes between Braime because it's a fic just for these two.

* * *

She thought she had lost the child. After the fight with Sandor Clegane, she laid on her back and tried to feel it. Brienne breathed hard, tried to calm herself down. But it wasn't easy. In the last few months, the unborn child in her belly began to move. It was surprising when she felt it for the first time, but she became used to it. She even liked it. These moving were a sign. It was real. She carried his child.

But now, after the hard and exhausting fight, her baby didn't make a move. She had begun to show, but under her armor, no one could see it.

"Please," she begged silently, while she put her hand on her belly.

"Lady Brienne!" She could hear Podrick calling after her and slowly, she sat up.

"I'm here!"

Seven hells, she felt like shit. But it was no time; she needed to find that little girl, Arya. So she forced her body to stand up. Kept looking for the girl half the day, but couldn't find her.

"You need to rest, my lady. Let us have a meal, and then I'll take care of your wounds."

Brienne was so exhausted; she only managed to nod. The child hadn't moved the whole day.

Her back was aching like it never had before. She sat down and rested her back against a massive rock. No, she didn't feel very well right now.

Podrick made a fire in front of her when Brienne realized that she became wet between her legs. In a panic, she looked down. No blood.

"My water has broken," was all she managed to say and looked to Podrick.

Her only help to bring her child into this world. It couldn't get any better today.

"Wh...what?" Podrick's face was pale from one second to another. Brienne was sure that this wasn't anything he had expected for today.

She hadn't too.

But a child chose it's day to come into the world. And her baby wanted this day.

"Cook some water Podrick." She stood up to remove her armor when the first contraction caught her.

"Shit!" That wasn't anything she'd expected, but she pulled herself together and removed her armor so that she was able to handle her birth. One look at Podrick told her he wouldn't be a good helping hand; he watched helplessly from his work to Brienne and back.

Giving birth wasn't easy, and it took hours until the baby was born. In the early morning hours, her little child came to face the world.

Brienne felt exhausted, everything hurt, but she took her last strength to cut the umbilical cord.

While she gave her child - a little girl - to Podrick who should clean it, she remembered the last time she saw the father of her kid.

* * *

It was after the wedding of Joffrey and Margaery. Cersei told Brienne that she knew, Brienne had feelings for Jaime. "You love him."

Jaime was getting stronger with each day, Brienne saw it from a distance. He cared about her but couldn't do that very often, Cersei seemed to be around every time he tried to speak to her, it was frustrating.

Joffrey was dead, and Sansa had left Kingslanding. No one knew who helped her.

Brienne knew she had to leave that day. She needed to find Sansa and bring her back to Winterfell.

She had made all her preparations when Jaime sent someone to escort her to him.

He was in his rooms when she came to see him. He asked her to read what he had written about himself. She didn't like what he wrote, and it was too harsh.

Then, he had three presents for her.

A sword.

"Valyrian steel." She looked at him.

"Mhm. It's your's."

Brienne tried to protest. "I cannot accept it."

"It's made from Ned Starks sword. With it, you defend his daughter. You have sworn to bring back his daughter's to her mother. Lady Stark is dead. Maybe, Arya is dead too. But you still can find Sansa. Bring her to a safe place.

An armor.

"I hope the dimensions are alright."

It was black and would fit her perfectly. She knew as she saw it.

"I will find her," Brienne managed to say.

"For Lady Catelyn," she said and watched Jaime then.

"And for you."

He looked at her. She could see the emotions behind his eyes. Brienne was fighting too. He took her hand in his and squeezed it. Then, he kissed her.

When they pulled away, he smiled a sad smile.

"I almost forgot, I have something else."

They went outside and made her known to her new squire. Podrick.

"I don't need a squire!" Brienne has always been on her own, why would she need someone now?

"Of course you do!" Jamie argued and watched her with amusement.

"He will stop me!"

"My brother owes him something. And he isn't safe here, and you'll beware him from harm. That's gallant, don't you think?"

"I won't stop you, Ser," Podrick said, and both, Brienne and Jaime watched that young man, she in disbelieves, he in amusement.

"My lady...I will serve you very well," Podrick corrected himself.

"See? He's a good man."

What could she say? She would take Podrick with her, so she sighed and nodded.

Then, they said goodbye.

"It's been mentioned, the best swords have names. Any idea?" Jaime asked her, while he looked at her.

She didn't need to think a lot about it.

"Oathkeeper."

Jaime smiled, and after a moment, he nodded. They looked at each other for a long time.

"Good bye, Brienne," Jamie managed to say after a while. She could see tears burning in his eyes. She didn't felt other ways and only nodded, walked to her horse, to her squire.

She didn't want to look back, but after a while she did. It was the hardest goodbye she ever had. And days later she still felt, like she'd left her heart back in Kingslanding.

* * *

Brienne managed to clean herself, while Podrick cleaned her daughter. He had put her in some clothes they bought whenever they could and gave the child to Brienne as she sat down again. She was so tired but couldn't stop watching the little girl.

"She's beautiful, Mylady," Podrick said with a smile and watched them for a moment but then decided to give his lady a meal which she accepted thankfully. Brienne ate and fed the baby at the same time. She didn't know how she managed that, she never thought she could. But it worked.

After that, she laid down. She was exhausted and needed to rest. Podrick would keep watch for her. While Brienne drifted off to sleep, she thought about the name. But the decision was easy. "Joanna," she said to the little girl in her arms and drifted into a deep sound sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys, another time has passed. This time we will see everythin from Jaime's view before we see what Brienne did with little Joanna, I hope you enjoy :)**

* * *

Jaime tried to not think about Brienne.

Really.

He knew she wouldn't send a raven to let him know everything about her journey. If she was successful.

Jaime knew she couldn't.

But he desperately wanted to know.

Was she doing well?

Did Podrick everything to serve her right?

Did she already found and save Sansa?

They already knew that it had been Littlefinger who kept the girl at the wedding. Littlefinger sold her to the Boltons after he had married Lysa Arryn, and their last news was that Sansa Bolton was missed. Cersei still wanted to find her, wanted to kill Sansa.

Jaime believed in Brienne, knew that she'd found and saved that girl.

He stood in his rooms, lost in his own thoughts, watching the ocean in front of Kingslanding.

"You miss her."

Cersei. She stood right behind him, and he hadn't heard her coming. He was so lost in his thought's for god's sake.

"Who do you think I miss?"

"Lady Brienne. You miss her. I need to fill your head with other thought's don't you think?"

Jaime looked at her. He didn't understand what he'd loved about her some time ago.

Cersei had changed.

He'd changed also. Jaime realized a while ago that he wasn't in love with his twin anymore. But what could he do? She owned him. He was a one handed man, a Kingslayer, a man without honor. He couldn't leave her, couldn't betray her. They were together since they were children. Even in her mother's belly, they were together.

There was no place for Jaime but at her side. He knew he didn't want to be with her, he also knew which woman he wanted at his side. But he didn't deserve that.

"What do you expect me to do?" He just asked and turned around to watch Cersei. As always the last time, she had a glass full of wine in her hand, watched him with a bitter smile. She'd been so beautiful recently, but Jaime couldn't find anything now.

"We received a present from Dorne." Cersei showed him the gift, as they arrived at Cercei's rooms. A handmade red viper with Myrcella's necklace in his mouth. A warning Cersei believed. And Jaime did too.

"Our daughter is alone in Dorne. Surrounded by people who hate our family. It is a warning."

"No letter?" Jaime asked.

"They blame us for Oberyns and his sisters dead. I will burn their cities if they put any harm on her!" Cersei jumped from her chair and screamed.

"Please be quieter."

"Our daughter is in danger, and you just worry that I'm too loud?" She asked him in disbelieve, and Jaime raised his eyebrows. "They must not know that she is our daughter. You know that."

"Then she isn't your daughter. You have never been a father to her!" That hurt more than Jaime wanted. But it was true, he knew it best. He wasn't allowed to be a father.

"If I would be a father to them, every child of mine would have been stoned to death!" Jaime argued in anger.

"And was it worth while?" Cersei watched him for a moment. "Our oldest child poisoned at his own wedding. Our only daughter had been shipped to Dorne. Our baby boy engaged with that smiling whore from Highgarden!" She sat down again, Jaime watched her, looked at his feed to hide the tears burning in his eyes.

"I make sure that it will become better."

"You never made anything better," Cersei argued. They didn't watch each other anymore.

"I travel to Dorne," Jaime decided. "And bring our daughter home."

Cersei just laughed. "You just can't beg Prince Doran to give her back to you! She is engaged to his son!"

"I don't want to beg him." Jaime had other plans. He looked for a moment at Cersei, he would bring Myrcella back to her. He would.

And so he did.

He just took Bronn with him.

Everything went as well as it could. The got caught. But Prince Doran was gracious. He allowed Jaime to take Myrcella with him but didn't break the engagement. He decided to sent his son with them. Myrcella was happy about it. She seemed so in love.

Until they were on their journey home. Myrcella told him, she was happy that he, Jaime Lannister, was her Dad. The truth to be told, that was the happiest moment in his whole life.

And then Myrcella died. In his worthless arms.

* * *

He wasn't himself after that. And when Cersei told him to go to Riverrun, he was glad that he could finally leave Kingslanding, and his twin for a while.

After he'd pushed the siege, the Frey's had started so damn poorly, he went into his tent to get a little Rest.

"Ser Jaime?" One of his men called him.

"What?"

He was tired, he wanted to rest.

"A woman, dressed in a black armor wants to speak to you, She said her name is Brienne of Tarth, and she has your sword."

Within seconds, Jaime was fully awake.

"Let her come in," he called and waited.

It didn't take long until Brienne came into his tent. She stood at the entrance and waited.

"Lady Brienne." Jaime couldn't say more. He wanted to, but his feelings were so overwhelming. It had been years since they'd seen each other and now he realized how much he actually had missed her.

"Ser Jaime."

She came one step closer, her eyes full of emotions. "I've heard about your loss, I'm so sorry."

No one told him that before. Everyone told Cersei, she was Mycrellas mother.

But not him. He was the uncle. Uncle Jaime.

But to loose Myrcella in his arms was so harrowing. Jaime didn't tell anyone. And now there was Brienne and said how sorry she was. For him.

He could just nod. Wasn't even able to say one word. His eyes burned with tears, he could barely hide them.

After a while, he cleared his throat and tried a smile.

"How are you, Lady Brienne? You look healthy and well." His voice sounded raspy.

Jaime just couldn't speak about Myrcella. Not now.

"I'm fine," she tried a smile, too.

But Jaime saw it in her eyes, there were many unspoken words, so he closed the distance between them.

And he embraced her. He couldn't let it go, Jaime just needed to feel her, her arms around him. And she did respond.

"I missed you, Mylady," Jaime whispered into her neck. Brienne was a bit taller, but it didn't matter. To him, she was beautiful and everything he needed.

"Same."

Brienne's voice was full of emotions, so he held her a bit longer. They were alone, they would take the time they needed.

He pulled away, just a little and watched her face.

God, he loved her eyes. They were beautiful. Like sapphires. Jaime put his right hand on her cheek and caressed her softly. He could see she wasn't able to speak either, so after a moment, he kissed her. To taste her lips again, after years, felt incredibly good. Again, she did respond, and for the first time in weeks, Jaime Lannister felt alive again.

Jaime and Brienne held each other for a long time. But they needed to talk, Brienne was here for politics and Jaime was too. They weren't on the same side, but they managed it.

After they talked, Brienne tried to give him back Oathkeeper, but Jaime refused to take it back. He smiled at her, she was so pure.

"It's yours, it will always be yours."

She looked at him, nodded and put the sword back on her armor.

The last time he'd seen her was at the river. She was in a little boat with Podrick.

They waved at each other and Jaime watched her until he couldn't see her. He wished he'd kissed her one last time but still felt her lips on his, her arms around him. Seven hells, he loved Brienne of Tarth.

When he arrived back at Kingslanding, his last child Tommen was dead.

And he felt dead, too.


	5. Chapter 5

After a month, Brienne decided that it was time to say goodbye to her little girl. If she would've kept her just one day longer, she would never be able to give her daughter to her dad. But she couldn't take care of her. Not at this times. Not while Queen Cersei was alive.

So Brienne wrote a letter.

She saved milk.

Podrick bought clothes they would need.

He would bring her daughter to Tarth. Joanna had to be safe. She had to.

"Again Podrick. What will you do?" She asked him this question twice a day, but Podrick was patient and answered all everything she asked him.

"I will ride to White Harbor. From there I will ship directly to Tarth. I will ask for an audience with your father. When I'm allowed to talk to Lord Selwyn, I will give him the letter you wrote." He mentioned to his bag, where her letter was in. Brienne nodded.

"I will give him your daughter. You are sure that he will accept your begging, he will raise and treat her well," Podrick said and smiled a little.

Brienne smiled at him too. "Right. You will go tomorrow. We can't wait another day."

She needed to say goodbye to Joanna. Brienne would do that tonight.

She'd never seen herself as a mother. As a warrior, yes. But to have a little girl on her own, felt it growing in her belly. And after she gave birth to her, fed her and carried her, Brienne realized, that she never wanted to miss it.

That's why she kept her daughter a bit longer than planned. She didn't want to give the girl to her father. But Selwyn Tarth was the only and best option she had. Joanna couldn't stay at her side.

The next morning, Podrick and Joanna left her. Brienne never felt so alone, and for a moment she let herself grieve.

She cried for the first time in a very long time.

For the loss of her child, she didn't think of seeing her again in her life.

For Jaime, she didn't believe she would ever be able to tell him.

The letter she wrote for her dad included Jaime Lannister as Joanna's Dad. As soon as Cersei was dead, her father would send a raven to Jaime. He should know, but not as long as Queen Cersei was alive. Joanna wouldn't make it out alive. And she wanted her daughter to live a happy life. There was no better place than Tarth for this.

After that, she didn't allow herself to even think about her daughter or Jaime. She had a job to do.

* * *

Podrick's journey took a month. He came back without Joanna. His mission was successful. Her father had accepted her wish and sent a letter with Podrick to let her know he would do everything, Brienne begged him for. At least, he wrote, he was happy that Brienne had finally found a man who loved her a, a man she loved.

She had the best father, Selwyn of Tarth was the kindest man she ever knew. Brienne loved him even more as she read his words. She then burned the letter. No one was allowed to know her secret.

"We will never talk about Joanna anymore. Do you understand that, Podrick?"

"Yes, Milady, I will never mention her anymore."

She nodded, and they continued their journey.

They found Sansa.

Saved her.

Took back Winterfell and Brienne trained Podrick, he became better these days.

Served Sansa when her person was asked.

Met Jaime at Riverrun, where he kissed her again.

Where they talked, held each other.

Jaime didn't look good.

He'd lost his second child, and Brienne couldn't comfort him, by letting him know that there was a little girl who knew her daddy loved her.

Again, she said goodbye to Ser Jaime.

Watched Littlefinger from a distance, she didn't trust him an inch.

Bran Stark came back from the North. Jon Snow, now the King of the North, decided to visit the Dragon Queen.

Arya Stark came back from nowhere.

And Sansa Stark, the new Lady of Winterfell? She decided to send Brienne to Kingslanding.

"You said Ser Jaime was always kind to you," Sansa argued when Brienne told her she didn't want to leave her behind.

"Let me leave Podrick here then."

"I don't need anyone to protect me. There are more than enough Northmen who will do that instead of you! Hurry, your journey won't be easy these days!"

Brienne could just nod. She had to follow Lady Sansa's words. And so Podrick and her traveled to Kingslanding.

Back to him, the man he loved.

* * *

He'd lost his third child. When she saw him at the Dragon's pit, his appearance was worse than ever. The first thing she thought was: he's broken. His sister finally made it.

Jaime could barely look at her. But she could see in his face that he wanted to.

She tried to talk to him after Cersei left the pit full of anger. He went away.

"Ser Jaime." Brienne tried to walk after him.

"It's been good to see you. I imagine the next time will be across a battlefield."

Jaime walked straight behind his queen, didn't look at her, his face a mask.

"We both saw what just happened," she tried again, wanted to reach him with her words.

"We both saw that...thing."

"Yes, and I'm not looking forward to seeing more of them. But I'm loyal to the queen, and you're loyal to Sansa and her dolt brother."

Brienne grabbed his shoulder, angry this time.

"Oh, fuck loyalty!" She turned him around to face him.

"Fuck loyalty?" He watched her in disbelieve. Never ever she'd said something like that. She could see that she'd confused him with her words.

"This goes beyond houses and honor and oaths. Talk to the queen!"

She pleaded him, looked him straight in the eyes, and for a moment, Jaime looked in her eyes too.

He then took a look at Cersei, she was looking at them, watching them but turned around to walk away when she saw Jaime looking at her.

For a second he looked after his queen, then turned around to Brienne.

"And tell her what?" Jaime asked her. She could see a lot of emotions in his eyes, even if his face was a mask. Maybe he was not lost. Brienne wouldn't give up hope. She would fight for him.

They walked away, and Brienne didn't give it another try.

Tyrion Lannister did.

And he was successful it seemed.

The queen came back and promised her help fighting the White Walker.

After everything was said and done, it was time to leave Kingslanding. Brienne and Podrick rode together on their way home, Brienne didn't want to sail with the others.

She had a feeling.


	6. Chapter 6

**From now on, I won't follow the story or these terrible spoilers for Season 8 I've read. I hope you like it :)**

* * *

 **Jaime**

He'd left Cersei.

Indeed, he hadn't believed in himself until he'd left Kingslanding with nothing more than a little bit of money, Widow's Wail and his horse and took the road north.

There was only one thing left to do for him. Jaime would tell Jon Snow and Queen Daenerys that Cersei betrayed them.

Cersei wouldn't help them, never planned it. And she didn't trust him, her twin anymore. She was about to marry Euron Greyjoy.

His place wasn't at his sister's side anymore. Wasn't it for a long time.

He should have left earlier, maybe he wouldn't feel that broken, perhaps Brienne wouldn't hate him.

All the time, after their too short talk in the dragon's pit, Jamie thought about the woman he loved, how she looked at him with these sad, sapphire-blue eyes. Brienne wouldn't understand why he reacted like this.

She wouldn't forgive him how he acted, how he pushed her away from him, didn't look at her, he thought so. He did it to protect her. Jaime knew Cersei had been jealous. She would have killed Brienne if she hadn't left Kingslanding to find Sansa. But how could Brienne know?

One thing was left to do: He needed to talk to the Dragon Queen.

When he'd told Jon and Daenerys what happened, he would leave his life in their hands. If they decided to kill him, it was good. There was nothing left worth living for.

He decided to rest at a tavern. Sat there in a dark corner and stared at the fire.

He drank. A lot.

Jaime didn't realize how much. But he didn't want to think about anything anymore.

He wanted silence.

* * *

 **Brienne**

Brienne decided they would need a rest. So they stopped at a tavern later in the evening. She hoped the most people would be in their rooms. And so it was. She only recognized one person in a dark corner who appeared to be very drunk. She didn't waste another look and sat with her back to him. Brienne wasn't a friend of drinking.

They got their rare meals and began eating them. Yet Podrick seemed to be interested in that drunk man. He looked into his direction from time to time.

"What is it Podrick?"

"Don't you think he looks just like Jaime Lannister?" Podrick asked her silently Brienne promptly turned around. She took a second look at that guy. This time she watched him closely. Podrick was right. It was him.

Without another word, she stood up from her place and went to him. He didn't recognize her, he watched the fire and seemed so sad and, indeed, so very drunk. He held his mug of ale in his hand. She knew he was broken, saw it in his eyes. But she'd never seen someone in such a dejected state.

"Ser Jaime?" Brienne spoke carefully. Her heart ached at his sight. He lifted his head so he could face her. His eyes were red rimmed, and when his gaze finally met hers, which needed some moments, he didn't seem to believe she was truly in front of him. Jaime didn't say anything. Maybe he couldn't, Brienne hadn't seen him drunk before. Drunk and so lost.

She sat down beside him, carefully put the mug of ale out of his hand and away from him. Indeed, she didn't know how to react, so she asked the first question, which came into her mind.

"Did you eat something?"

Jaime just watched her, but she could see in his eyes, he was about to cry, and honestly, she didn't know what to do, so she looked over to Podrick, asked him to help her to bring Jaime to her room for the night. Whatever it was that had happened to him, he needed to rest and then they could talk.

They managed to bring him upstairs. It wasn't straightforward. Jaime missed every second step, so they carried him most of the way. Brienne opened the door with her feet, and after they finally sat Jaime down on the bed, she sent Podrick away to get some food for Jaime.

She pulled Jaime's shoes from his feet and his pants off his legs. Pulled off this stupid golden hand. Kept his shirt on and helped him, to lay down. Jaime wasn't in the state to help her, he could barely manage to sit on the bed, he was about to lose his balance when she didn't hold him. It took her a while until she definitely made him lay down.

When she covered him with a blanket, he finally did something. He searched for her hand and Brienne, gladly for this, put her hand on his. She looked at him, and if it was possible, Jaime's eyes became sadder.

"Don't go," he slurred. Brienne's heart ached at his sadness, but she nodded and squeezed his hand.

"I won't go anywhere, just let me take off my armor," she smiled a little when he nodded and loosened the grip of her hand. Podrick brought their food and helped Brienne with her armor, after that, she sent him away again.

"I will call you when you're needed. Maybe we stay a little longer in this tavern than planned."

Podrick nodded and left the room.

Brienne turned around and looked at Jaime. With eyes closed, he laid on the bed. She didn't take time to think and took her place beside him. He opened his eyes at the movement, just a little so he could see what happened.

"You're here," he managed to say, his eye lids seemed to be very heavy. "Really here," he slurred. His words were barely hearable.

Jaime tried to touch her, but his movements were unsuccessful, his body was not under his control.

So Brienne reached to him carefully. Her hand caressed his cheek very soft, and he closed his eyes. Very soon he began to weep bitterly. His whole body was shaking, and a sob escaped him. What in the seven hells happened to him? Brienne felt totally awkward at that moment. Her hand rested on his cheek, and she watched him helplessly, overwhelmed by his sadness. And Jaime didn't stop crying for a while. Brienne decided some moments later to rest her head on his chest. He said he didn't want her to go, so she wanted him to feel her. It was the only thing she thought that would help him, and it did. Slowly, she helped him, when he tried to lay his arms around her, but couldn't manage it on his own.

He held her close to his body until he relaxed a little. He stopped crying after a while, drifted off to sleep. Brienne didn't sleep that night, she couldn't.

* * *

 **Jaime**

He woke up in a soft bed, he could feel the pillow under his head, the blanket he was wrapped in. Carefully, he opened his eyes. Seven hells, he had a badest headache since ever. He moaned a little when he realized something else. Blonde hair. His body tensed. Did Cersei find him?

"Ser Jaime? Everything's alright?"

Brienne. He sighed deeply and relaxed. He didn't know why she laid in his arms, but that didn't matter. She was here, with him. Later, he would ask her how she found him, he couldn't remember anything.

"I think so," he slowly answered her question but didn't move. Maybe he was too afraid that this was just a nightmare. That Brienne wasn't here, wasn't in his arms.

But she moved, sat up a little to look at him. "You look peaky. Do you need anything?"

He snorted a little. "Thank you, Lady Brienne. No. I don't know." He closed his eyes again. He didn't know what he needed at the moment.

"Ser Jaime?"

"What is it?"

"What happened to you? Last night...you..." Brienne stopped talking, so he opened his eyes again, just to look at her.

"Last night?" He asked her, he didn't understand what the matter was.

"You...cried.. a lot, half the night. I...what happened that made you so sad?" Brienne had a worried countenance when she looked at him, and he lifted his left hand, wanted to touch her, but let it fall again. He looked away from these sapphire-blue eyes.

"I left Cersei, that it is. I left her, and now there's nothing left for me."

Brienne said nothing, only took his hand in hers. He let her, but his heart ached, he was so afraid, that she would pull him away. But she didn't. Instead, she sat up so she could better look at him.

"Why do you think there's nothing left?" She asked him when he said nothing more.

"Cersei won't send anyone to the North. She tried to get me killed." Jaime tried and looked at Brienne's direction. Her expression didn't show any emotion.

"You knew she wouldn't do that, right?"

Brienne only nodded. His wench had always been so much smarter than him.

"I'm such a bloody fool, I believed her. I've been on my way to tell the Dragon Queen."

"You're not. You've been loyal, and you wanted your sister's words to be true, there's nothing stupid in this," Brienne argued, and he wanted to believe her.

"What will you do then?" She asked him. He looked away from her and closed his tired eyes for a moment.

"I don't know. What's left for me, Brienne? I don't have many options.."

"You have! There's always an option!" He knew she would say that and smiled a sad smile.

"For you. But not for me. No one will trust me, I'm the Kingslayer, a one handed cripple knight. I betrayed my Queen, my sister. I couldn't save my three children, I disappointed you. There IS nothing left for me."

"Stop talking, you goddamn idiot!" He snorted but stopped talking. So, she wanted to say something, at least he was glad that he didn't need to speak.

"There is a reason, you must believe me. I cannot tell you right now, but there is something worth living for. And I'm not disappointed. Why should I?"

"I treated you like a stranger, you should be disappointed with me. What is it then? The reason?"

"Oh come on, that's all? I've had much worse. And I understand why you did so. Don't you think I haven't seen? Do you think I'm angry with you because you didn't kiss me in front of your murdering sister? Come on Jaime, I know you couldn't. It's alright. I can't tell you here, nobody knows it, and I want it that way for a while."

Jaime opened his eyes, god he felt like he was about to cry when turned his head to look at her again.

"Why do you trust me, Brienne. Why do you think I had a reason to do so?" He asked her. He couldn't believe she sat there and said all these things.

"I know you. And I saw it in your eyes. I could see how you wanted to say something more, something real. I see you." Tears burned in his eyes. She was so right.

"You're grieving, and that is alright Jaime. But I'm here, I'm with you. I love you. And nothing you do can change that, don't you dare and believe anything else."

Jaime looked at her. Brienne's cheeks flushed a dark red, but she didn't turn her eyes from him. She meant what she said. Jaime sat up, ignored his headache and pulled Brienne in a tender embrace. The only person in his life who still believed in him. Jaime couldn't be more thankful for that.


	7. Chapter 7

**Brienne**

Jaime pulled her into his arms and Brienne responded for sure. She was glad that he did this. "I love you too," she heard him whisper in her ear, and she smiled a little at these words.

"Don't ever think that I do not believe in you," she answered him. "Because I do for a long time and I will believe and trust you, okay?"

"Okay," she felt him nodding a little, and when he finally ended the embrace, he looked like he was about to cry again. But he cleared his throat and took a deep breath to calm himself.

"It's okay if you feel like you need to..." Brienne started to say when Jaime began to talk.

"No. It's alright. I need to clear my head," he argued, but Brienne shook her head. Some things needed to be spoken. Even she did that. But Jamie hid all the things that hurt him somewhere in his mind. Brienne knew it was important to talk about this stuff.

"I think you shouldn't push all these things in the back of your mind."

"I always did that Brienne. Why shouldn't I do that again? I need to talk to Queen Daenerys, to Jon Snow. They need to know what's going on. When I did that, I still can grieve. I still can think about what happens next, if they don't decide to kill me."

Brienne looked at him with wide eyes. She couldn't believe what he was saying there.

"They won't kill you. You're there to help the North, to fight with them, they won't do that."

He smiled in disbelieve. "You don't know that Brienne. You don't."

"I know that I won't accept that. I will speak for you. I will vouch for you. You have honor, you did the right thing, even if it's late."

She wanted to protect him, his life with every bit. He needed to know that he still was a father.

"I've always been a late man Brienne. Maybe I'm too late now."

"You are not!" Brienne accented louder than before, she wasn't angry, but she wanted to make her words very clear to him.

"You are not too late, we will fight together against these White Walkers and then we need to talk, you need to grieve. But you will make it, and I will make sure of it!"

"Brienne..."

"No, Ser Jaime. If it's not for me, then make sure to stay alive, because the reason I offer you will be enough for you. Enough to want to stay alive." She stood up from the bed promptly, headed to the table, where Podrick put the food for Jaime.

"You need to eat, then we can head to the north."

"Brienne wait, please." Jaime slid to the edge of the bed and watched her back. "I will make sure. Whatever you need to tell me can wait. I'm worn out, and I know that, but I'll pull myself together...for you."

* * *

 **Jaime**

Jaime knew he hurt her, he knew he wasn't in the best condition. But Jaime knew he wanted to be with Brienne when all these things ended. He was glad that she found him, she made him feel worth at least a little bit.

How she wanted to protect him, it warmed his heart in a way he never thought was possible.

When he stood up, he felt a little dizzy, but it went away with the first step he took to Brienne's direction.

"Don't be angry with me, Brienne. I'm sorry."

Brienne just nodded and mentioned to the plate with food for him.

"Eat then. As soon as you are ready, we will leave this tavern and ride to Winterfell."

"Brienne, please, look at me."

She sighed and turned around, watched him with a calm expression. "What is it?" She asked him with a silent voice when he reached out to her hand, she didn't pull away.

"I hurt you with my words, I know that. But I meant what I said. I love you Brienne, and I will pull myself together for you. Don't be mad at me."

"I'm not angry, not anymore." At least, she was honest with him. She smiled at him, and he nodded while he responded her smile.

"I'm an idiot. Like you told me. I have to find a new way from now on. I thought it would be far easier."

"It's alright. As long as you apologize and let me know what's wrong."

Jaime nodded. He would try, for her.

"Thank you, Milady. I will do my very best."

He would do it, be the man she knew. He could do it.

Eventually, he sat down at the table and began to eat.

* * *

 **Brienne**

While she put her armor on, she watched Jaime eating. She hoped he would honestly pull himself together. Brienne would stand for him, fight for him if it was needed. But he needed to fight too. She couldn't save him when he decided there was nothing worth living for.

"I know you are watching me. What is it?" Jaime asked between two bites, and Brienne could feel how she blushed.

"I'm worried. That's all."

Jaime looked up at her a little smile on his face which reached his eyes.

"I'm glad to know, Milady. But you don't have to..."

"Nothing someone says before the word but really counts," Brienne argued. "I do, and I have to. I want to. Nothing to discuss here."

Jaime looked at her, stunned, then faced his food again and ate the last bits.

"Thank you..." Was all he said after he pushed the plate away. She just nodded and waited for him, while she put on her sword. There was nothing more to say.

When he had finished his meal, he put his clothes, his golden hand on and the three of them headed to the north.

It was a long journey until they reached Winterfell. It wasn't boring after all. Brienne and Jaime shared their tent every night. They hadn't sexual intercourse, but at least, they were together, and Brienne enjoyed every minute with Jaime. He got more like himself with every day. Some days, even she felt how free he was, free of his sister's ghost. And Brienne couldn't be more pleased about it, she thanked the Seven every morning and every night for that.

* * *

And in Kingslanding? A Queen decided it was time for her twin brother to die. She sent out men to find Jaime Lannister, and to kill him.

Queen Cersei poured herself some wine and, satisfied with herself, she sat down on the Iron Throne, a mad smile on her face, one hand laid protectively on her belly. At least, something of Jaime was left in her.


	8. Chapter 8

**This chapter will be the last post for the next 9 - 10 days. I'm away on vacation, to enjoy the warm Grecian weather, instead of the rainy german one :)  
But I hope you enjoy this little chapter, have a very good time :)**

* * *

 **Jaime**

It was one day before they would arrive at Winterfell when Jaime realized they got chased. They rode in a slow trot when he suddenly stopped.

"Brienne. We need to split up."

She stopped beside him. One look on her face told him, she'd realized too. She nodded.

"Go to Winterfell, give them the news from my sister. I will come after you."

"Jaime..."

Jaime shook his head. "You know who they are after. I wait for them, I kill them. And then I will catch up with you." He smiled at her, and she tried to smile back.

"I meet you in Winterfell, Lady Brienne. Everything will be just fine. You know that you are more important. Tell them what Cersei is about to do."

"Jaime...", she looked at him. Concerned. "Jaime, cannot fight alone. We stay. We fight together." Podrick, right behind her, nodded. "We won't leave you here. I...we can't-do that."

"Brienne...I won't kill myself. Just, I want to protect you, I want that Queen Daenerys and Jon Snow know what happens in Kingslanding."

"They will know. When you are telling them personally. We split up, but we do not leave you here on your own. Podrick and I will lie in wait and attack them when they think they're safe. I won't leave you again Jaime. Don't ever think I can do that again."

Her cheeks blushed, but she looked straight into his eyes, which burned with tears. Never, never he'd felt such strong feelings towards a woman. Yes, he felt a lot for his sister, the only woman in his life, he thought it was love but this. These feelings were compared to nothing he'd ever felt. This was love, and he wished they could spend some more time together...when the war was over.

And, what left him speechless was that Brienne seemed to feel the same. All these emotions in her eyes. God, he wished he could kiss her right now.

Instead, he agreed. He would ride north, and Brienne and Podrick would give a wide berth to attack their enemies from behind.

* * *

 **Brienne**

It felt awkward to leave Jaime again. Even if it was for maybe half a day. She was so concerned about his state. Indeed, she was afraid that he would get killed. It didn't seem to her that Jaime wanted to fight. He seemed determined to reach the North at sometimes. At other times she didn't know what was going on in his mind. He often seemed lost in thoughts. But she wouldn't give up on him. Brienne knew he loved her, she saw it in his gaze. She would fight for him.

"Podrick," Brienne waved at him, to ride near her so that they could talk.

"If anything happens to me, make sure Jaime knows. Make sure he will travel to Tarth."

She didn't watch Podrick's face as he turned his head towards her.

"Swear it. Podrick. Make sure."

"I...I swear Milady. I will make sure that Ser Jaime knows what happened. I will make sure that he will travel to Tarth."

"Thank you Podrick. You are a man of honor."

Brienne couldn't believe that she was proud of him. Years ago she didn't want him at her side. Now she was glad that she took him with her as her squire. He still wasn't the best one, wasn't the best fighter. But he did so much for her. Brienne couldn't be more thankful.

They waited for a long time until the men came. Too much for her to kill them alone, but not enough for her, Jaime and Podrick.

Brienne and Podrick followed them. They were very fast and soon, they reached Jaime, who seemed to take a rest at a lake.

* * *

It was a hard fight.

While fighting, Brienne didn't realize that much. She saw Jaime falling, as three men attacked him at the same time. Saw Oathkeeper cutting through the fellows who attacked the one-handed man she fell in love with. Saw herself reaching her hand towards Jaime, saw him getting his sword back. Saw the men falling. They fought back to back.

Jaime realized how Brienne chopped herself through these fellows. She was an impressive warrior woman, covered in his armor and blood, handling Oathkeeper like it was light as a feather. He realized how Brienne's eyes sparkled as she helped him to come back to his feet after he fell. How beautiful she was.

He didn't know how many men they killed.

Podrick realized the first man of this army he'd killed. He was younger than him. Blonde hair and blue eyes. Covered in his own blood. He realized after, how Brienne and Jaime fought together like one man. Back to back. Saving each other with every move they made. It was like a dance as he watched them together. They were cutting through these fellows as if it was nothing. At this moment, Podrick Payn realized, these two were made for each other.

But Podrick realized too, that one man fled. The man stole a horse and galloped off as fast as he could.

* * *

 **Jaime**

He watched Brienne as she cleaned Oathkeeper with powerful and slow moves. They had washed their faces in a small river. Everything else could wait until they reached Winterfell. But Brienne needed to clean her sword before the journey could go on.

Podrick sat down beside him. He still looked a little pale, but he did a good job in this fight.

"One man fled."

Jaime looked at him. "What?"

"One man fled during the fight. I couldn't stop him, was too far away. He headed back to the South." Podrick looked at him, full of shame, but Jaime just smiled.

"Nothing to worry about, Podrick. My sister will know, this way or another, it doesn't matter."

Jaime could feel Brienne's eyes on him, as he talked to Podrick, her movements had slow down, she was listening.

"Let's worry to come to Winterfell as fast as possible. The Queen will take care of my sister when the time has come."


	9. Chapter 9

**Here we are, back in action. We're finally reaching Winterfell. I really hope you enjoy :)**

 **Brienne**

She still worried about Jaime, but this fight seemed like it had put some life back into him. He caught her as she watched him and smiled at her, it reached his eyes, and she couldn't do anything but to smile back at him.

"Are you okay?" Brienne asked him, and he nodded. "I'm alright, Lady Brienne, don't worry too much about me."

"I do, nothing will change that." Again, he smiled a little but accepted her words. She wouldn't stop caring about him. When she was ready with cleaning Oathkeeper, they took the last miles to Winterfell. It took them a few hours until they saw the gates from a far distance. One hour more and they stood right in front of the gates. A few minutes later, they passed through them.

Brienne wasn't surprised that Jaime got surrounded by the Northmen.

"You brought the Kingslayer into our Gates, Lady Brienne?"

He was chained faster than Brienne could react, and she tried to walk between them and Jaime, but they stopped her before she could reach him.

"He is here to bring some news for Lady Sansa. Inform her. As long as we wait I will have an eye on him."

She tried to speak with as much self-confidence as possible, straightened her back, one hand on Oathkeeper. She didn't break eye contact to the guards.

"Why don't you just go by yourself, Milady? We will keep an eye on the Kingslayer."

Brienne smiled about that. "How do I know that you leave him alive? No, I'll wait with Ser Jaime." This time she walked through the guards, stopped at Jaime's side.

"What's going on here?" A voice from above called and as Brienne looked up, she saw lady Sansa standing at the stairs, looking towards them.

"Lady Sansa!" Brienne called her. "Ser Jaime Lannister wants to talk to you."

"I'm here with news from Kingslanding, Milady," Jaime called out, looking at Sansa. He stood silently, unimpressed by all these guards around him. Jaime focused on the Lady of Winterfell, but Sansa's gaze became cold as ice.

"So? What do you want, Kingslayer?"

Brienne could see his body stiffen as Sansa called him like that, but he cleared his throat and began.

"I'm sorry to have some bad news, if you want me to tell you right here, I can do it, but maybe it's something to talk about in private...," he began, but Sansa interrupted him.

"No. You can tell me right here, right now. Then I will decide what to do with you," Sansa answered stubbornly and arrogantly while she watched him.

"As you want it Milady." And so he began. Jaime told everything he knew about Cersei's betrayal.

* * *

 **Jaime**

When he was ready, Jaime just looked at the Lady of Winterfell - Sansa Stark. She was different from her time in Kingslanding, almost reminded him on Cersei, which made his skin crawl.

The young woman stared at him for a long time.

"Do you believe him, Lady Brienne?" Sansa asked without stopping watching him.

"I believe him, and I trust him, Milady!" Brienne answered her question and Jaime couldn't hide a little smile.

"So. I know you two have some kind of history together...Lady Brienne it's up to you to keep an eye on the Kingslayer until Jon is back at Winterfell. He should decide..." Sansa paused for a minute until she spoke again.

"I won't imprison you, Kingslayer. But be sure there will be an eye on you with every step you take. See yourself as a prisoner behind the Gates as long as my brother decides what we will do with you."

Jaime nodded. That was more than he had expected. More time with Brienne. Some time to figure some things out, time to rest until Jon came back to Winterfell.

"Thank you, Lady Sansa. I will prove to you that I mean no harm. I'm here to fight with you, not against you." Jaime would show everyone. He would earn their trust, didn't matter how long it would take.

"We will see. Take a bath, you will share a room. I'm sorry for that Lady Brienne, but it's to our best. I hope you understand."

Jaime and Brienne had shared a bed a long time ago, he remembered every second of it. It would be amazing to have her beside him again. To be true, he couldn't wait.

"We will manage it, Milady." Brienne's face was unreadable for the most people, but Jaime could see excitement but also a little nervousness too. They would figure it out.

Sansa went back inside, and Brienne led Jaime inside too.

They went to her room, it was warm inside, someone made a fire and filled a small tub with hot water for them. Brienne closed the door and locked it.

"Just in case someone controls my work," she said when Jaime watched her.

"It's alright. I'm a prisoner here, you're doing the right thing."

He turned his back on her and first, he removed his golden hand, threw it on the desk, which was in front of a small window. It was a relief to be without it.

"I'm sure you want to take a warm bath Milady," he said then, turning towards her.

"If you don't want me to look, I won't do it." He wasn't sure what it was between them. Jaime knew he loved her, but, did Brienne feel the same?

"You've already seen everything."

Her cheeks turned in a lovely pink, but she looked right into his eyes. Jaime smiled. "That I have. And I absolutely enjoyed every expression...and every touch."

"Jaime..." Brienne said with a sign of desire.

"Brienne?" It was almost a whisper, but the look in her eyes. So many feelings. He took a step closer, the same time like Brienne did.

"I...," she stuttered, he could see how tense she was.

"It's alright, whatever it is we will figure it out okay?" They didn't need to talk tonight, they were both exhausted, dirty and hungry.

Brienne nodded, but there was something, he could see it in her eyes.

"Ser Jaime...would you, would you kiss me?"

Jaime was stunned for a second. She asked him to kiss her, Brienne really did that. The woman in front of him was so much more self-confident than years before. It didn't matter that she blushed again, she asked him to do so, gave him the sign he needed. So he closed the gap between them, laid his left hand on her cheek.

"There's nothing I want more at this moment." He whispered as his thumb stroked her cheek. And when their lips met again after this very long time he couldn't stop. All he needed was her, Brienne of Tarth in his arms.


	10. Chapter 10

**Finally, some baby talk, let me know what you think and leave some comments whether you like my story or not, I'm always glad about reviews :)**

* * *

 **Brienne**

"Jaime...we need to talk." Brienne felt, indeed, very happy as Jaime kissed her, caressed her cheek. She wasn't sure about his intentions, but his kiss showed her, that he still had feelings towards her, romantic feelings.

"Talk? Talk about what?" Jaime looked surprised but nodded in agreement. He sat down on her bed, looking a bit concerned at her.

"What is it, Brienne?"

Brienne cleared her throat, took a deep breath and sat down beside him. She folded her hands in her lap. This wasn't easy for her. She hadn't talked about Joanna in years, hadn't allowed herself to even think about her. But everytime a raven from Tarth came, one sentence, who was ever there, took her attention: 'She is alright, she knows." Brienne felt happy every time she read it but burned every letter from her dad.

"Brienne?"

She looked to Jaime, she was so lost in her memories that she forgot to speak. "Sorry, it's not easy for me." Jaime took her hand with his left one and smiled. "Nothing you will say can pull me away from you, alright?"

"Alright." That was good to know, indeed. But Brienne would honestly believe it when he showed what he meant.

"When...when I left Kingslanding all these years ago, I realized something...," Brienne started, looking at his hand on hers, squeezed his hand for a second.

"I was pregnant, Jaime."

She allowed herself to look at him, he was staring at her, getting pale. "Pregnant? How...who's the father?"

"You! Do you think there was another man than you? It was you, always. Then and now, all these years."

Brienne ignored the fact that he thought there was another man. He didn't know it otherwise. She looked away again.

"I counted...six month's...and I just started to feel sick. I didn't show."

"What happened? Brienne please..."

She held Jaime's hand and told him everything that happened.

"The day, our child was born, was after I fought with Sandor Clegane. It was a bad fight, and I thought, our child was dead. It didn't move the whole day after that match. I searched for Lady Arya who was with him, but I couldn't find her. When I sat down in the evening, my water broke. And I gave birth to her."

She fell silent for a moment, gave Jaime his time to handle this information.

"A girl? Was it...was it dead?" Jaime asked carefully, and she shook her head.

"No. Our daughter is alive. She's with my beloved father at Tarth since she lived on a month at my side."

Suddenly, Jaime loosened the grip on her hand and stood up from the bed. "Is that true? You were pregnant with my child, and you didn't even bother to tell me? Couldn't you find a raven?" Jaime asked her with a chilly voice. He walked to the window, with his back to her, sounded angry, she could tell.

"I could have told you, but I was afraid..."

"Afraid?" He asked angrily, turned around to face her.

"Afraid that I wouldn't believe you, afraid that I wouldn't take care of her? Afraid, that I would betray you? Afraid that I am not able to carry her? Me, the cripple? What is it Brienne? After all, I thought you would be the one person who sees me. "

"I see you, Jaime. Why do you think I'm telling you right now? It broke my heart that I couldn't tell you that a child is waiting for you. It broke my heart that I wasn't able to raise her as my own. But I was afraid of your fucking sister, Jaime Lannister! Do you think she would have left the child? Alive? I think she would have killed her before she was even born!"

Brienne took a breath, watching Jaime as some anger felt from his face.

"I need some time Brienne," he only answered, and she nodded. What else could she do? He left the room without a word.

Brienne sighed deeply but didn't allow herself to cry. She put her clothes off and took a bath. After that, she went to bed, but sleep wouldn't come. She'd thought of every reaction, Jaime could give her. But that wasn't included. Brienne closed her eyes again and sighed. Hopefully, Jaime would understand her with some time.

* * *

 **Jaime**

He went through the corridors of Winterfell, restless. Couldn't think of anything but the child who could be his own. He wasn't angry with Brienne, Jaime Lannister was mad at himself, mad at Cersei.

He was the most stupid guy in whole Westeros, being with his sister, if he had met Brienne earlier, he would have become a better man. But that wasn't true, he was an arrogant, narcissistic idiot back then. If he had met Brienne earlier, he would have been cruel to her. Now he had a real chance to become a better man, the man he wanted to be.

But knowing there was a child out there, who could truly be his, threw him off balance.

He needed to think. Cersei carried his child if it was true, and he hadn't told Brienne. It was not like he wanted it as his own, but it was there, a dark cloud in his mind. His and Brienne's child would be around five now. A girl. Jaime hadn't even questioned the name.

"Jackass," he murmured as he passed a young woman, she stopped him, grabbing his arm.

"Ser Jaime. Aren't you allowed to walk alone through Winterfell? My sister mentioned something like that.

"Lady Arya?" Jaime was stunned for a moment. He didn't know, that she was back. Suddenly, Jaime felt proud of Brienne, she made it. Sansa and Arya were back at Winterfell.

"Yes, Ser. Where's Lady Brienne?"

"I'm sorry, Milady. I needed a moment on my own, I won't do anything, you can trust me. I will go back to our room soon." He didn't mention Brienne. Jaime, for sure, didn't know how she was, how she felt right now.

"So...there happened something between you and her. Whatever it is, Ser, I know she loves you. And I can see it in your face that you admire her too. I've watched you today when you arrived at Winterfell. My parents loved each other. And as my father left Winterfell, separated us from another, we've all been lost. Don't let it happen to you and Lady Brienne. She deserve's happiness. And maybe, you deserve it too."

He couldn't react because the younger lady was gone very fast. How could she read both of them so well? She was so young but appeared so wise in front of him. But it helped him, whatever she did, it calmed him down.

And suddenly, Jaime realized that he was a fool to leave her rooms, so he turned around and headed back to the woman he loved so deeply.


	11. Chapter 11

**Some more Baby talk for you today. I hope you like it, I didn't feel Jaime needed to be angry with Brienne for doing such a good thing. So I hope you enjoy how he feels about his daughter.**

* * *

 **Brienne**  
When she heard the door open and closing, Brienne could barely hide a sigh. She knew she'd had to walk after him, but Jaime needed his time and she did too. She still wanted Jaime at her side. Never, in all the time she loved a man the way she loved him. Not even Renly.

Brienne wanted to sit up, wanted to talk to him, but she let Jaime make the first move. And he did. He sat down on the bed beside her and touched her shoulder. "Brienne? Are you awake? I'm sorry," he whispered, and she turned around to face him in the darkness, there was just a little light which came from a small window. Luckily the moon was shining bright tonight. He didn't waste a minute when she looked at him.

"I'm a bloody fool. I understand why you didn't tell me. I would've done the same if it had been me. You did the right thing, and I just thought you wanted to hurt me. You saved our child, yourself and I weren't even able to think about what it must have meant for you to give your child away. How you must have felt... I haven't even asked for the name you gave her. I'm so sorry, Brienne. I..."

"Stop." Brienne interrupted him, taking his hand in hers. "It's alright. You don't know it otherwise Jaime, and I understand that. Your sister is not me, and I would never betray you...see you as a cripple. If you're not ready to talk about our child, about us, it is alright too. But don't ever think I would see you like your sister. I love you Jaime Lannister, with all my heart, and it didn't change. You're a good man, and I want you to be the father of our daughter...when you're ready for it. I just...I want you to know if something happens at the war that is about to come. You need to know that there still is a reason to live for."

"Brienne I have a reason. The reason is looking at me right now." He squeezed her hand and smiled a little at her. "You're so right. I don't know how to handle stuff like this. I feel glad that there is a child out there, who's mine that can live a happy life. I don't know if I ever am able to face her...can you give me a second chance and tell me everything about the birth, about her, how our little girl looked like?"

Brienne felt the tears burning in her eyes. That was a reaction she imagined. Words she hoped to hear. "Yes," she managed to say and moved over so Jaime could lay down beside her. He didn't waste a second, removed moth of his clothes but left his pants on. Jaime laid down beside her, pulled her into his arms.

"I missed you so much Brienne, I haven't been myself the last time, and I know that, but I love you so deeply, don't think of me in a wrong way. Nothing has changed for me either. Please, if you want, tell me about our girl."

* * *

 **Jaime**  
He could feel her cheek was wet when she placed her head on his chest. After all, Brienne was a woman. She could hide her feelings very well, Jaime knew it, but sometimes, even she needed her moment, and he knew all too well that he made her feel like she needed to cry.

But she began to talk about the birth after a few moments, and Jaime listened to her, while he softly stroke her short blonde hair.

"I gave birth to her all alone. Pod went pale and stared at me like I had three heads. At least, when she was born, he cleaned her, made her cry for the first time and put her some clothes on, while I cleaned myself."

"You did that all alone" Brienne nodded at his chest. Seven hells. He used to be with Cersei when she gave birth to their children, it was so painful to even watch her giving birth.

"I named her after your beloved mother. I heard you calling her name after you lost your hand and laid with fever. It seemed to me that you loved her very much."  
"I did, thank you," he whispered. He loved his mother, Joanna Lannister so much. Jaime hadn't realized that he called his mothers name after the loss of his hand, but at least he was grateful, Brienne heard it and named their daughter after her.

"I had her with me about a month when Pod brought her to my father. I couldn't do it on my own, the risks were too high that someone recognized the child and me. I didn't want to think about what Cersei would have done with Joanna. Pod did a good job, he brought her safely to Tarth, and she is growing up very happy."  
Jaime couldn't hide a smile.

"How did she look like?" He asked her after a moment. Jaime was sure that she hadn't allowed herself to cover up a picture or anything like that."  
"Joanna had your green eyes when she left with Pod, blonde hair, pink cheeks and every time she looked at me she smiled the brightest smile I have ever seen. Such a beautiful little girl." Again he smiled and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"I'm glad you saved her," Jamie whispered and pulled Brienne in his embrace. He needed her in his arms and could feel she longed for it too.  
"She knows who her father is."

"She...how?"

"In the letter, I wrote to my father I begged him to raise her like his own. But I also asked him to tell her who her father and mother are, when she's old enough to understand. Since she's four years old, every letter I receive from my father, there is one sentence: She knows."

Brienne stopped talking and left Jaime stunned and speechless. This woman was the most incredible he'd ever met. He couldn't do anything in reply for what she did.  
"If we make it out alive, will see her together, right?" Brienne asked sleepily, her head still on his chest.

"We will, Brienne. No one, dead or alive will stop me from bringing us to our daughter."


	12. Chapter 12

**Here we are, Chapter 12 3  
It's not time yet for the war but I'm not really good in describing war scenes, be prepared that we will skip these and will just have a summary from Brienne's and Jaime's view. But I think that will be okay with you :-) Have a great weekend!**

* * *

 **Brienne**

She woke up when someone was banging on her door. "Milady! Time for breakfast has come!"

Podrick.

Brienne stifled a yawn. "We'll be there in a few minutes," she called and watched over to Jaime who was already awake, watching her.

"Morning, my lady," he smiled at her and Brienne couldn't hide a smile. She was so glad they had talked about Joanna.

"Morning," she whispered back. "Hungry?"

"Lika a lion," he answered with a grin. "Or...should I say, like a Wolfe? Like a dragon?"

Brienne watched him looking a bit confused.

"Maybe like Jaime Lannister?", she asked while sitting up and climbing out of her bed, grabbing her clothes. "Sounds better, you're right. Brienne smiled to herself when she put her clothes on. Jaime sat up and got dressed too.

Brienne watched him from the side. She wanted to see, how he handled things, but he became very talented in dressing with just one hand, he still needed a second hand with closing his pants, and she could see he didn't like it. But Brienne had an idea, she would send Podrick to the Smith later, to see what he could do for her.

When both of them were dressed, they walked through the corridors to the hall, where the breakfast was served. Many men were sitting around the tables who were talking very loud, but when they saw Jaime entering the room, they suddenly fell quiet. Everyone was watching them.

Brienne ignored them, so did Jaime. They walked past these people gathered their breakfast and sat down at a table, where Podrick was waiting for them.

"Good morning Milady. Good morning, Ser," Podrick greeted them with a short smile. "King Jon, uhm, Lord Jon and Queen Danaerys arrived that night, they want to speak to both of you after you finished breakfast. Brienne nodded in response. She didn't know how to feel about that, she eventually felt nervous and lost her appetite within seconds. But she forced herself to eat her small breakfast, they would have some sparring later, and she needed her strength.

Jaime appeared to be very quiet during their small lunch, she understood that. They didn't know what would happen to him. At least, Brienne hoped, Jon would realize that Jaime was here to help them, to fight for them.

"Ready?" She asked him when she was finished and looked at his direction. "Ready." He nodded and smiled at her direction. Together, they walked to the main room were they met Queen Daenerys, her hand, Tyrion, Lord Jon, and Lady Sansa.

Brienne and Jaime greeted them and kneeled down. They waited...waited long until eventually, Daenery spoke.

"Stand up and face us Lady Brienne, Ser Jaime. We've heard you have some news for us."

They stood up, and Jaime told them everything he knew, told them that Cersei was about to fight against Daenerys and Jon, not with them. That Euron Greyjoy was about to catch the Golden Company for Queen Cersei, that she wanted to marry him.

"I knew we couldn't trust our sister." Tyrion sighed and sat down. "So she's gonna marry Euron Greyjoy? Seven hells, I didn't think she would debase herself so much."

"So, Ser Jaime. What is your part in this plan?" Daenerys interrupted them, staring at Jaime. "You're here, you're still serving Queen Ceresi if I see it right?"

"No."

Jaime's voice was very confident, everyone could hear the truth in his words if they listened. But Daenerys still didn't seem to believe him.

"No? That is all you have to say? I don't know how to think about your action right now, Ser Jaime. Why are you here?"

"I'm sorry, I'm not serving Cersei anymore, I'm here to fight with you against the White Walkers, I'm here to serve you if you want, to prove that you can trust my word. And I'm here for Lady Brienne. I don't want to waste another second, doing the wrong decision, being with the wrong woman. And if you need something, to prove my words are right, I will do it, Queen Daenerys."

Brienne felt her cheeks burning when Jaime spoke of her, and all four, Daenerys, Jon, Sansa and Tyrion looked at her in surprise, but she kept her head up high, looking at them, still glad about Jaime's words.

"Always good for a surprise, brother." Tyrion was the first who reacted, but he smiled. "So you and Lady Brienne?"

"Yes, little brother, me and Brienne, for a long time and now that I'm finally able to show it, I don't want to change it anymore," Jaime said, grabbing Brienne's hand.

* * *

 **Jaime**

He was nervous as hell. Tyrion was the only one who finally answered him, Daenerys, Jon, and Sansa were still watching him with surprise and concern. Tyrion seemed to be very happy for him, he kept smiling all the time since Jaime spoke of Brienne. Jaime didn't know how to handle these glances of the others, but he waited, afraid to say something wrong. And finally, Queen Daenerys spoke.

"Ser Jaime. Your words are faithful, I believe them. But still, I need something to prove your loyalty, and I'm glad that you will bend the knee to your new queen."

Daenerys waited, but it took only seconds for Jaime to lose the grip of Brienne's hand, walk towards Daenerys and bend the knee. If that were a thing he could do, Jaime would do it gladly. Cersei wasn't his Queen anymore, Jaime would be happy to serve the Dragonqueen together with Brienne. Truth to be told, he wanted to be where Brienne was, nowhere else. Jaime pulled out his sword, Widows Wail and placed it in front of his new Queen.

"Then I am yours, my Queen," he said. "I will shield your back and give my life for yours if it comes to that. I swear it by the old gods and the new."

"And I vow, that you will always have a place at my home and at my table. And that I shall ask you no service that might bring you dishonor. I swear it by the old gods and the new."

Jaime sheathed his sword back and stood up after the oath was spoken.

"Thank you, my Queen, for giving me a second chance. I won't fail you."

"I hope you'll demonstrate that my decision was right by trusting you. We'll talk about it when you've proven your words in actions, Ser Jaime. For now, I want you and Lady Brienne to train our people. We've heard, you're a good fighter. The Death is coming, and we need to fight them as hard as we can, now that your sister won't join our fight."

She looked over to Brienne, who was right behind him.

"I'm happy for you both. The world needs love now more than ever."

Jaime meant to see even a little smile and was surprised about these words. He still was when Daenerys, Jon, Tyrion, and Sansa left the room and when he felt Brienne's hand on his shoulder. "Time for me, to say I'm proud of you."

He could hear the smile in her words and couldn't hide his own smile.

"Thank you Milady," he said and turned around to face his woman. He smiled at her and pulled her hand in his to pull her closer. And when he kissed her he felt, today, he'd done everything right. Jaime Lannister, also named as the Kingslayer was finally able to change his life into the right direction. He had a woman at his side who was made for him, and, when the war was over, he was finally able to be a father.


	13. Chapter 13

Hey guys, I hope you like how my story goes! I will post some parts of the war in the next chapter when we face Brienne and Jaime again. I don't like to write war scenes so I won't go into it too deeply, but mention some important things for the story to go on.  
But I enjoyed writing this chapter, and I hope you enjoy reading it!

* * *

 **One year later**

Selwyn Tarth

On the isle of Tarth, a young girl, about six years of age was watching the ocean right in front of her. Selwyn Tarth, who sat in his chair, was watching her. She was way too tall for her age, had long, golden hair. And if she would turn around to face him, her beautiful big green eyes would look at him, like his daughter's eyes used to do when she was a lot of years younger. And like her mother's preferences, she loved to wear armor and also loved to fight. But, she liked wearing dresses too, if it was necessary.

She was such a pretty girl, Selwyn thought, inside and outside.

"Do you think, he will arrive soon?"

Joanna turned around to look at his grandfather with her big eyes.

"I don't know sweetheart. We don't even know if the raven reached him until now," he spoke with a calm voice and smiled at his grandchild.

"I wish we would know," the young girl sighed and turned back to watch the ocean. She did that the last two days, hoping a ship would arrive. And when a ship came, she ran to the harbor, hoping he would be in it.

But Jaime Lannister was lost. Almost half a year had passed by since the war was won. Since Queen Cersei and the Night King had died. Since Queen Daenerys and King Aemon took over Westeros. It had been peaceful these last months.

Even Brienne came back to Tarth. Lady Sansa sent her home to recover and to rest.

She'd changed so much, Selwyn thought while he watched his only grandchild facing the sea.

Brienne hadn't told him much about the fight. She didn't speak much the most time, lost in her own thoughts. But with Joanna around, she smiled at least. Told her stories about her father, which Joanna knew since she was old enough to understand. But his grandchild loved these stories, she could hear them again and again and again. Her father was her biggest hero in the whole wide world like Joanna used to say. And talking about him seemed to help his daughter, so, it was just fine wasn't it?

Once, he'd asked Brienne about Jaime, about what had happened and she just answered that she didn't know.

That they'd lost each other while fighting against the Night King and his White Walkers. That no one had seen him since that fight. He was supposed to be dead. And his daughter was grieving his death.

But two weeks ago, something had changed. A raven had arrived from a woman, living in the North who wrote that her family found a man, about six month's ago. He was severely hurt but was on his way to recover health, even healthy enough to travel. He had named himself Jaime and had asked them to send a raven to Brienne of Tarth. To let her know that he was alive, that he would make his way back to her as soon as he was able to.

When Brienne had read the letter, she'd burst into tears and had fallen down on her knees. She didn't calm down for a while, holding the message in her trembling hands, had whispered a few times: "He is alive, he is alive."

When Selwyn thought of this moment, his heart clenched. Selwyn had never seen her weeping like this, a truce to be told, his only daughter had never really cried in front of him. She'd barely shown emotion, had tried to be strong. Back then, he'd seen, how much his daughter loved the Kingslayer, how much it must have hurt her to think he was dead.

When Brienne finally had calmed down, they'd written a letter to that woman in the North. Had sent her family enough money for Jaime's journey to Tarth and for her to live a good life for almost a year.

That was two days ago.

Brienne wanted to go together with Podrick, to get Jaime back on her own, but changed her mind when she saw the sadness in her daughter's eyes. Joanna was so glad, her mother was back home, she didn't want her to leave, or wanted Brienne to take Joanna with her. Brienne couldn't allow that, she was still recovering from a bad dragon's burn all over her back. She would force herself to travel back to the North. Looking for her little girl would be too much, and Brienne knew it. So, his only daughter handled wise and decided to stay in Tarth, to wait for Jaime. It was no easy decision, Selwyn could see it all over her face. She was restless since the raven arrived, like Joanna.

He stood up from his chair and went to his grandchild, placed a hand on her shoulder.

"He will come, but it may take a few days or weeks, depends on the weather," he explained her. She had to understand that she didn't need to wait here. The weather had become better these last months, but sometimes it was still stormy outside the sea, especially in the North.

"But I want to wave at him when he comes," Joanna said silently, still facing the ocean in front of them.

"When he does, someone has to call me, please," she begged and looked up to Selwyn, who smiled at her.

"Alright, that's something easily done. But don't waste your time standing here, watching the sea. Go and spend time with your friends and your mother. I will ask the guards to have a look on the ship that may take your father with it."

Joanna nodded with a lovely smile. "I would love if you could do that, grandpa, thank you so much."

She is such a lovely girl, Selwyn thought when the little one hugged him and ran out of his rooms. Selwyn was very grateful, for the experiences of being a grandpa, he would have missed it. And, he was glad that his daughter had found her love. Even if it was the Kingslayer, which Brienne said, wasn't the truth. Jaime Lannister had saved all of them, Brienne had explained him in her letter which was brought from Podrick Payn when he arrived with his grandchild, six years ago. And Selwyn believed his daughter. Brienne was such a smart woman, she was able to look behind a mask. And she had seen the real person behind the exterior of Jaime Lannister, named as Kingslayer, and fell in love with him deeply.

* * *

Joanna Lannister

Joanna made her way to her mother's rooms. If anyone could understand how much she wanted to be the first, who her dad would see when he arrived than it would be her. She had been the first one to greet her mother when she had come home a few month's ago. And it had been so special for Joanna. She'd never seen her mother or father before in her whole life. Joanna could remember every second of her mother's arrival. She was standing at the Harbour, waiting for her ship. And then Joanna had seen her, standing at the railing. When Joanna had begun to wave, her mom had waved back and that had made her so happy. After her mother had left the ship, Joanna hadn't been shy for a second, just remembered running into her mother's welcoming embrace. That was the happiest memory she had ever had. Seeing her father would make her that happy too, Joanna knew it. She so badly wanted to meet her father, wanted to get to know him, listen to his voice, huddle up between him and her mother in the evenings. Just enjoying them being united after six years. Her grandpa had told her everything about her parents since she'd been old enough. And since then, Joanna had missed them so badly. But she'd understood why her parents hadn't been with her. Her grandfather's stories had helped her a lot, and she knew them all inside and out.

She knocked on the door and opened it right after that. She knew her mother wouldn't be angry with her for running into her room without waiting for an answer.

"Mom?" Joanna called out because she wasn't inside, but the doors to the little balcony of her mother's room were open, and she could hear her calling after Joanna.

"I'm here," Brienne called, and Joanna went outside to see her mother sitting in a chair, watching the ocean just like she did before.

She was smiling at her when Joanna arrived at her side.

"Everything alright?" Her mother asked her as Joanna crawled on her mother's lap. Joanna nodded and huddled up against her mom.

"I was watching the sea too!" She explained and smiled when she heard her mom's chest vibrated with a small laughter.

"There's no way I can deny that you are my daughter," she said while putting her arms around Joanna's body. Her mother kissed her on the top of her head and together, they watched the sea for another hour.

"Do you think, it will take long before he is here?" Joanna asked her mom, leaning against her. Her mom was so strong and tall, Joanna felt so safe with her.

"I think it will take a few weeks," her mom answered. "It's a long journey from the North," she explained, and Joanna looked to her mother's face.

"How much time did you need to reach Tarth?" Joanna asked then, and her mom looked down at her with a soft smile on her lips.

"It took us two weeks to reach the Harbour and another week to reach Tarth. But we had perfect weather, windy times at the right time. It isn't always that fast."

Joanna nodded slowly then. She was hoping for a better answer but her mom always told her the truth, and that was so important for her. Even if it didn't make her happy for the moment.

"So, we have to watch the sea for the next three weeks or longer," Joanna decided then, and her mother laughed.

"Yes, that is what we will do, sweetheart. But we'll have to train few hours a day, right?"

"Right! I want to show father how good I am in sparring and swordplay!"

"He will be so proud of you. Just like I am," Joanna's mother said softly, and Joanna grinned at her. She loved her mom so deeply.  
"I love you, mom."


	14. Chapter 14

Finally, I've had the time to write another chapter! Sorry about the delay! But I hope you like the new chapter anyway :)

* * *

 **Brienne**

When the fight was over, the death was defeated, Brienne couldn't move a single bone. Her back was scorched by dragons fire. To her luck, it wasn't more. But it hurt more like a typical incineration. Brienne couldn't lay on her back for weeks. She was forced to rest in her bed, forced to stay in Winterfell, even if she genuinely wanted to do something more important.

She needed to find Jamie.

They lost each other through the fight, and nobody had seen him until now. Lady Sansa couldn't effort people to look after him, for she needed them in Winterfell. Brienne understood it, but couldn't stop thinking about Jamie. She knew he was outside there, alive. So, Brienne sent out Podrick to look after the love of her life.

After a week he came back with zero results.

Two weeks later, she couldn't take much more. She got out of her bed, put on what was left of her - of Jamie's - armor, took Oathkeeper and went to the stables to get a horse.

That was when someone cleared his throat.

Brienne turned around, she faced Tormund who was looking at her with concern.

"Can't let you out of Winterfell Brienne. Direct order from your lady," he told her silently.

"But I have to go. Tormund, please..."

"No. Your life's very important to me, don't you think I let you go on your own and hurt. You wouldn't make it back to the wall."

Tormund came a bit closer to her, still watching her.

"He's so important for you? Eh? You could go on. Live a happy life with some other men, men like me."

He grinned at her, but Brienne shook her head.

"No, Tormund. Really, you're a great fighter, and I respect you. But I don't love you, I could never love you."

She took a deep breath.

"Actually, Jamie is very important to me. I love him. We wanted to live together after that war. I wanted him to meet his child, which is 5 years old now and hasn't met him in her whole life. So yes, Tormund, he is so important for me."

Brienne couldn't believe it.

She'd told Tormund stuff he would laugh at her for. He wanted her, Brienne knew that since they'd first met each other. But she couldn't respond his feelings, then, couldn't return them now.

And, to her surprise, Tormund's face grew softer.

"You carried his child? Eh?" He asked her and Brienne nodded. "Yes, it was a secret because of his sister. But now, she's dead, and we are able to be together for real. I cannot believe that he's dead, I think he's still outside there. And I have to find him."

Slowly, Tormund nodded.

"You're an impressive woman, Brienne. And I adore you. But a man has to know when his fight is pointless. But I can't let you go, to search for him. You're in pain, I can see that."

"Tormund. I have to go now." Brienne said firmly. He was right, she was in pain as soon as she moved. But she couldn't stay here.

"I can't stay here, knowing that he's still out there and no one's looking after him. I just can't do that."

Brienne was desperate. She needed to find him. Dead or alive. Yes, she had pain, her whole back felt still like it was on fire, but to leave Jamie, that was no option for her.

"Hey calm down. I have an offer for you."

Brienne watched him, waiting, with not a bit patience.

"Come on, tell me, Tormund, what is it?"

He grinned at her and began to talk.

"I take two of my men and go. I'll look after the Kingslayer...after your man...," he corrected himself as he took a look from Brienne.

"I'll bring him back to you, if I'm able to, I will send a raven as often as I can to let you know how it's going. But I need a promise that you go home and rest. Go to your child, enjoy your time and let your back heal."

Brienne listened to him, and after a moment, she turned around to think about this offer. She knew she couldn't find Jamie all on her own out there. She knew she could trust Tormund, he would do everything he could to find Jamie. But would she be able to go home, to Tarth and wait there? Could she leave Jamie and enjoy her father's and daughter's company? She didn't know that all her thoughts included him. She was a mess right now. Could she face her daughter in her state? Brienne was sure, that little girl would expect a strong woman, but she wasn't strong right now, felt weaker than before.

But if Jamie had a chance, then it was Tormund, so she decided.

"Do it. I'll go in three days. I take Podrick with me."

Brienne turned around to face Tormund again.

"Find him. Bring him home. Tell him where I am. Take a raven with you and stuff to write. I need to know everything."

Tormund grinned at her but finally nodded.

"Alright, I can do that, if that's all you wish."

She sighed, but she had no other choice.

"Thank you, Tormund, really. Thank you for your help. If you ever need something..."

"Stop, Brienne. It's alright. I wanted you, but I can't have you. So, lemme say, I want you to be happy. And if that's just with that coward..." Another look from Brienne made him clear his throat. "With that man, actually, then that should be enough for me."

Brienne looked at him, surprised by his words, but she accepted it like he said it.

She left the stables, went back to her room, and called after Podrick. She told him their new plans and told him to get their things together and enough supplies for their journey to Tarth.

Then, she visited Lady Sansa, who agreed to Brienne's newest plan. Her Lady knew that Brienne needed a rest, a timeout. She let Brienne take two of her best horses and even some money. They were able now to get a comfortable cabin on a ship. Brienne appreciated that.

Two days later, Brienne and Pod left Winterfell. Tormund had left it on the same day they had spoken to each other, and the whole journey, Brienne thought about Tormunds journey. Day after day she hoped that Tormund would find Jamie Lannister and bring him back to her.

* * *

 **Tormund**

He took two of his men with him and three horses. As many supplies as they could carry. Then they left Winterfell to search a man, he'd never respected before. Jamie Lannister wasn't a man he would think was worth to have a second chance to live. But when Brienne talked about him, told him she loved the Kingslayer, that they had a child together, Tormund changed his opinion about that man.

If a woman like Brienne was able to love a man like Jamie Lannister, there must've been something about it. So he decided to help her, she couldn't go on her own, and Brienne had trusted him.

He just could hope, that they would find a sign, or, much better, that coward himself.

It took them two weeks until they found his sword. Snow hadn't been falling since the Nightking was dead, so they were able to follow his tracks. He'd lost some blood, but that meant nothing. A few days later they found him.

His right leg was broken a few days ago when he fled from wolves. He had several wounds on his arms, one deeper wound on his flank. But the bleeding had stopped, and he was responsive.

"So Brienne send you to find me?" He asked him on the first evening they were together.

"Yeah, she couldn't go on her own," Tormund told Jamie. He'd forgotten to write Brienne, he just wanted to bring him back to Winterfell. He had never sent a raven to anyone before, so that was easy to forget for him.

"One fucking dragon burned her back, she's in pain, but will recover."

Jaime nodded, Tormund could see the man was in pain, but they hadn't things to help him with that. But he took it like a real man and Tormund was impressed.

"Glad you sent her back to her father. It's the best place for her."

"Yeah, thought that too. You'll follow her as soon as you're able too, eh?"

"As soon as I can."

Tormund smiled.

And then. Everything went to hell.


	15. Chapter 15

**I'm so sorry it took me like forever to get this chapter finished! But I'm quite busy around Christmas, for I'm working on a voluntary capacity at this time for old people who have no family, that's a very relevant time for me, to give those old people a treat :-)  
** **The next chapters will, hopefully, faster done.  
** **In here there will be a major character death, but I hope you like it anyway.**

* * *

 **Jaime**

It had been a tough fight for Jaime. It was not that he wasn't prepared for that shit. It was his right hand which wasn't there anymore, his fighting hand.

His golden hand was nothing more than a handicap to him, so he threw that golden fuck away as soon as possible. He fought his way through the Death, but he lost his sight of Brienne. They wanted to fight together until it was over.

After a while, he registered that he couldn't see Brienne or Podrick anymore. So he just kept fighting until he would be able to go after her, he desperately wanted to find her, wanted to protect her. But as soon as he was able to, he was attacked by someone he didn't know and lost his sword.

So he fled. Fled into some woods and lost his orientation. To his luck, there was enough snow so he wouldn't die of thirst. He lost his orientation, didn't know how many days he spent in the woods. He found a small cabin, where he tried to live until someone would find him. Jaime knew Brienne was out there, looking after him, she would locate him in time. He just had to make sure to stay alive.

So he'd spent the days with hunting. At some days he found a small rabbit, but it wasn't often. He'd been starving most of the days. Jaime saved wood to make sure he wouldn't freeze to death. These small things kept him running, kept him staying alive. Every day, he cooked water in a helmet he found on the battlefield, so there were many things to do for him.

He'd been in the North only one time and had stopped at Winterfell. Being in the North entirely on his own, wasn't something he wanted to have some experience with.

He didn't know when it was that he was attacked by wolves. Also, he didn't know how to make it out alive, but he did. He'd even killed one of these animals. It was the one which had broken his leg.

Somehow he made it back to his little cabin, he'd been able to gain some of the meat and some fur to keep him warm. Jaime knew he hadn't a good chance to make it out here alive. If the wolves came back, he would be a dead man.

But instead of the wolves, Tormund Giantsbane and a few of his men came.

Jaime couldn't be more relieved to see that man, even if he didn't like him that much. But to hear from him he was out here for helping Brienne to find him made everything better at once.

"So Brienne send you to find me?" He asked him on the first evening they sat together in front of a warming fire.

"Yeah, she couldn't go on her own," Tormund answered Jamie, while he cocked some beans over the fire. Jamie listened to him, he was relieved to know that Brienne wasn't outside here. He knew she was safe and that mattered more to him than anything.

"One fucking dragon burned her back, she's in pain, but will recover."

Jaime nodded, Brienne was a fucking strong woman, no one impressed him more than she did, ever. To know she handled wisely for their daughter, to be there for her if Jaime wouldn't make it out of here, was all he needed to know.

"Glad you sent Brienne back to her father. It's the best place for her."

"Yeah, thought that too. You'll follow her as soon as you're able too, eh?"

"As soon as I can."

Tormund smiled at him. It, for sure was the first time he saw the man smiling with sympathy. But that smile didn't last very long.

* * *

 **Tormund**

Tormund enjoyed their rest before they wanted to ride back to Winterfell. One night out there, before they would head back to their new home. But then, everything changed in the middle of the night. It was just one of them outside to keep watch. He was dead within seconds. When Tormund heard a quiet noise, he knew what would happen.

Wildlings had attacked them.

They were only a few man, one of them not able to fight and the Wildlings which attacked them were too many. The fight was lost before it had even started.

Tormund stood in front of Jaime, he knew who he had to protect. "Lay down, let them think you're dead!" He told Jaime. Tormund knew how critical their chance was.

It was over in a few minutes. Tormund had thrown himself upon Jaime, acted like a dead person, and they let him. To his luck, he was covered in blood from head to toe. All of his men were dead.

He felt the Kingslayer breathing under him, but they wouldn't move for a while.

* * *

 **Jaime**

Laying under Tormund protective body wasn't as simple for Jaime as the Wildling thought it would be. He had to force himself to not groan in pain because of his broken leg. Also, he had to push himself to breath slow and steady. He couldn't move it would only mean that the wildlings would find out they were still alive.

It felt like hours until their enemies were gone. For real it took only a few minutes. They left most of the dead bodies were they killed them. So it happened to Tormund and Jaime too.

Tormund laid still for another while until he rolled himself from Jaime, cursing under his breathes and looking around when he stood up.

"Motherfuckin' idiots!", he cursed and went to every dead body, caught up all the weapons he could find.

"So, Kingslayer, now we have to fuckin' hurry up to bring you to Winterfell as fast as we can, eh? These Wildlings will come back very soon to catch up the rest of the dead bodies. So I'll carry you the rest of the way, that gives us a better chance. We leave everything we don't need. So come on. Sit up!"

Jaime had never seen the Wildling in this state of panic, so he sat up, ignoring the pain in his body.

"Alright," he managed to answer when Tormund lifted him up to throw him over his shoulder. The pain in his leg was unbearable, but somehow Jaime was able to hide a groan.

As soon as Tormund began to run, he couldn't bear the pain anymore and not far after that his view became unclear, and he fainted.

* * *

 **Tormund**

He ran as fast as he could, holding Jaime Lannisters limp body over his shoulder. It was the best for the Kingslayer to have passed out, Tormund thought to himself as he ran into the direction of Winterfell. He was sure the bones in Lannisters leg would be worse if they would reach it. But he wondered if they would make it out of here alive. The Wildlings would come back soon. They would realize that someone was missing. And if they would be smart, they would recognize that it wasn't one, but two people who were running away. Fucking snow would show every move he was about to do, so he had to act as fast as he could.

Almost as he thought he would make it safe out of there, he felt a sharp pain in his right arm, which caused him to stumble for the first time.

An arrow had made it through the fabric of his clothes and hurt him badly. He felt the blood dripping from the wound. To his luck, he held the unconscious Jaime over his left shoulder. If they'd hit his left arm, he would have lost the grip of Jaime. So, he just kept running. A few more arrows nailed him on several places of his body. Some of them didn't hit the flesh of him, some did. Tormund was sure, Jaime got hurt more by that run, he was convinced some arrows would stick in his body too. He just could hope that Lannister wasn't too injured, or, worse, dead until they would make it to a safer place.

When Tormund could see the first village which belonged to the house of Winterfell, he, for almost the first time in his life was begging to the Old Gods of the forest and shouted out for someone to help him. He saw someone moving in this village but then he felt a sharp pain on his right shoulder, then on both of his legs which kept him stumbling before he fell to his knees. He had ignored all of the pain until now, but yet, where he saw help coming, he stopped fighting against the pain in his body. Tormund laid Jaime down when he felt another arrow meeting his body. He groaned in pain and lost consciousness before he fell down completely.

Tormund Giantsbane didn't wake up anymore. He'd made his promise and saved Jaime Lannister.

* * *

 **Jaime**

He didn't wake up often for the first weeks. He knew he was hurt badly, his whole body, mostly his broken leg was burning with pain. He had a lot of dreams. Most of them were about Brienne and the daughter he'd never met, and probably never would.

When he felt a cold cloth on his forehead one day, he opened his eyes slowly. Jaime didn't really know where he was or how long he'd been there, believing that Tormund must have found a place for them to hide.

But he didn't see Tormund's face. Instead, a kindly looking older woman faced him.

"Hello, you're awake, thank the Gods," she said, smiling at him with sympathy.

"You made us worry a lot. How do you feel?" The woman asked, and Jaime didn't need to think long about this question.

"Thirsty," he answered hoarsely. "Where's Tormund?" He managed to ask after that when the woman came back with some water for him. There was a man now at her side who helped him to sit up. Jaime at first thought he could make it on his own, but soon, he realized how exhausted he felt and how much pain he had. The woman helped him drinking while her husband held him and answered.

"You mean the red-head Wildling? I'm sorry to say that, man. But he's dead. He didn't make it over the first night you came to us. A bulk of arrows had hurt him, he's been bleeding out faster than my wife could stop all those wounds from bleeding."

Jaime just nodded and didn't respond. He hadn't known Tormund Giantsbane for a long time, but that man had saved his life and Brienne's. Brienne, for sure would maybe sad about this loss, but he couldn't think about that now.

"We buried him outside. Now, that we know his name he will become his own stone out there. We thought his last rest in the North should be honored." The woman told him, and Jaime nodded again.

"Thank you," he said to them hoarsely. But there were many other questions he had, so he kept asking until he knew everything.

"How long was I out?"

"It's been a month. You've been hurt badly. Your broken leg was worse, and some arrows hit you badly. You had an infection. But your fever sank last night, I think you're going to be okay in the next weeks." The woman told him. She seemed to be something like a healer. Lucky him, he thought to himself.

Jaime sighed. He wanted to be with Brienne until now. Seven hells he missed her like no one else.

"Is there someone we should inform, that you're alive?" The man, asked, sensing his longing.

"Yes," Jaime answered promptly.

"Brienne of Tarth She's at the Isle of Tarth and waiting for me," he answered. "I'll have to go home as soon as possible."

Nodding the man went away when he placed Jaime on the bed again.

"You'll have to recover one or two weeks, then I think you'll be able to make your way home," the woman said, smiling at him.

It didn't take long, maybe a few days for a raven from Tarth came back.

Brienne's father had written it and sent a lot of money with it so Jaime would able to pay for everything these people had done for him and find a good ship which would sail him to Tarth.

He couldn't wait to come...home. He'd never thought that of a place he'd almost seen from far away for what felt like a lifetime, but Jaime knew when he would reach it, this island would feel like his home.

It was about time to get some of his strength back.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hello back in the new year with a new chapter!**  
 **Thank you to ginar369 who helped me with a very good idea for this chapter! I appreciate your help, thanks again! :-)**

* * *

 **Jaime**

In the following week, Jaime and the people who'd saved him sent several letters to issue some warnings. To the couple's family and friends, but mostly to Winterfell. They needed to make sure, the people there would know about the Wildlings who'd attacked them and also had killed their own people.  
He wrote the letter in person to Lady Sansa Stark:

 _"Lady Sansa,_  
 _I'm writing you in the knowledge that you will handle the following information with caution. As you know, Tormund Giantsbane and a few of his men went out, looking after me. They found me, but only hours later we were attacked by other Wildlings, who didn't join the fight against the Night King. I'm sorry for I can not name you the clan they belong. I couldn't even describe their look, but I hope you'll have some people of the North in Winterfell who will recognize my inadequate description. Also, you need to know, they attacked us and killed all of Tormund's men. They took the dead bodies with them. I'm sorry for I can not tell you what they did with the dead bodies. Also, I have to thank Tormund, he saved my life at this day. He managed to rescue me but got killed too, which I feel very sorry for. He's buried here, for we could save his body. At this time, I'm recovering with the help from a family of your house. As soon as I'm able to travel, I will join Lady Brienne in Tarth._  
 _Ser Jaime Lannister"_

They sent the raven the same day, and Jaime hoped the people from Winterfell would be able to protect the North from more harm. Since the war was over, the North was still recovering from it, whole Westeros did the same to be true. The world didn't need some jackasses, killing other people.  
But he couldn't think about that right now, he'd done what he'd been able to and now needed to concentrate on his physical recovering. He wanted to reunite with his woman. Wanted to finally meet his daughter, he was very curious about the little girl, who for sure wasn't that small anymore.  
So he trained every day as much as possible, ate as much as he was able to and as soon as Jaime was allowed to walk he trained even more. It took him many weeks to get his strength back, but he wasn't as healthy as he'd been before. He still limped and needed a cane to stabilize him as he walked, but he refused to wait any longer. As much as his leg would hurt on his journey, it would have time to fully heal at Tarth.  
And when the day came, where he left the family who'd saved him, gave him food and helped him to recover, he just took the money he would need for traveling and left the rest of it with them. They would need it much more, and he was grateful for their help. He had to promise them to send a raven as soon as he would reach Tarth to let them know he arrived safely.  
He was able to find an old horse at a tavern on his travel to the next harbor where he would be able to get a ship to Tarth. It made the journey much more straightforward, for he didn't need to walk on his own. They traveled very slowly, but finally, he reached the harbor. Jaime sold his horse and used the rest of the money for the next best ship, which would sail to Tarth.  
In the following evening, they left the harbor and Jaime were glad about it. Soon, he would be able to meet Brienne again.

* * *

 **Joanna**

Every day she and her grandfather went to the harbor to check on the ships which had arrived. With every passing week, she grew more and more eager with her dad's arrival. Would he come at all? She so desperately wanted to finally meet him.  
"Be patient with your father," her grandfather told her.  
"He will come, it just takes some more time than we thought it would."  
Joanna sighed and nodded when she suddenly saw a ship on the horizon as they walked back to their home. Against her will, she grew excited. Maybe he was on this ship.  
"Can we please wait for just this one, grandpa?" She asked her grandfather, reaching for his hand.  
"Sure we can, sweetheart, maybe this is our lucky day," her grandfather said patiently, and she smiled gratefully at him. She loved her grandfather with all her heart and was lucky that he went with her, was so patient with her. They walked back to the harbor where they waited for another hour until the ship reached them.  
"It's a ship from the north! Can you see it?!" She realized excited, seeing the flag on the ship. Joanna squeezed her grandfather's hand and tried to pull him with her, but he stopped her.  
"Let's wait here, we have the best view from here, for we can see the people leaving the ship," he insisted, and Joanna thought about it for a while until she nodded.  
"Alright," she agreed then. Even if she wanted to be closer to the ship, she knew her grandfather was right. So she kept watching the people leaving the ship.  
It wasn't many people leaving the ship, and when she finally thought no one would follow them, a man left the ship. He was limping and walking on a cane. He had long-grown blonde hair and a beard. She could even see some grey hair in his beard. He was skinny and looked around like he didn't know where to go. Joanna observed him, feeling something stir inside her. The man felt familiar to her.  
"Grandpa...," she whispered, squeezing his hand. "Do you think it is him?" She watched that man, who suddenly looked in their direction.  
Joanna then knew it was him, she didn't understand why she just knew it was her father, so she let go of his grandfather's hand and walked towards the man, who was still looking at her. She stopped right in front of him. Joanna stared in what seemed her own green eyes, it was then when the girl finally realized it was him. She felt like she was complete for the first time of her life.  
"Dad?" She whispered, staring at him, waiting for a response. When she didn't get one, she asked something more.  
"Are you my father?" She couldn't hide her excitement as the man smiled at her.  
"If you would tell me your name, little lady, I would surely be able to answer your question," he answered her with a bit of a hoarse voice, and Joanna liked him even more.  
"I'm Joanna Lannister," she answered with a clear and proud voice, stretching her back which caused the man in front of her to smirk a bit.  
"Joanna...," the man said with a soft smile on his lips.  
Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder and turned her head around to see her grandfather standing behind her.  
But she turned her head back to her the man in front of her, still waiting for his answer. She stared at him, sometimes she wasn't very patient, so she asked again.  
"Are you my father? Are you Jaime Lannister?"  
The man, who had looked at her grandfather looked back at her again, and after a moment, he nodded slowly.  
"Yes on both sides," he answered and stumbled as Joanna threw herself at him to give him a big hug around his waist.  
"I knew you would come home today!" She whispered in excitement, hugging him as close around his waist, as she was able to. After a few moments, she felt his hands around her too. It was, besides being snuggled up to her mom, the best feeling in the whole world. Closing her eyes in happiness, she enjoyed the excitement of finally meeting her dad.

* * *

 **Brienne**

She sat outside her room on the small balcony, trying to rest while her father and daughter were gone to the harbor. Many weeks had passed since they'd heard from Jaime and she didn't know what took him that long. No one had mentioned his physical status besides the fact that he'd been badly hurt.  
Trying not to get impatient with him she sighed and decided to focus on a book instead. Brienne wasn't allowed to do some sparring for at least one more week. She couldn't wait for more conditional training again. It cleared her mind and made her calm down even more.  
After a few more moments on trying to focus on the book, she placed it on the table beside her, not realizing that the door to her room had opened. Staring at the sea, she didn't hear the man coming inside, leaning on a cane. Also, she overheard him coming towards the entrance to the balcony, where she was sitting at.  
A knock on the doorframe suddenly brought her attention back from the sea she'd been watching to the here and now. She turned her head to see a man standing in the doorframe. Hadn't she seen him before with this long beard and the poor condition, she would never have recognized him. Her eyes grew wide, and she stood up abruptly.  
"Jaime?" She asked, not believing that he indeed was standing right in front of her. "Is that really you?"  
"My lady," he just answered, and she felt her knees becoming weak only by hearing his voice. He looked exhausted and thinner than she remembered him. As he came outside to be a bit closer to her, she realized how badly he was limping. Overwhelmed with questions and emotions, she just stared at his appearance in front of her. She couldn't say one word.  
"Brienne?" Jaime asked, looking at her in confusion. He was delighted to see her again, she could read it all over his face. And she was too, she just couldn't handle all her emotions running through her, making her feel awful. Suddenly he seemed to realized what exactly was her problem, so he came close on his own, put the cane aside and pulled her into his arms without asking more questions. Feeling him, pulling her into his embrace, made her realize she was holding her breath. Letting out a heavy sigh she finally was able to move again, so she brought her arms around Jaime as well, leaning herself against him, inhaling his scent.  
"You're really here," she whispered after a moment, now fully believing it was him, Jaime Lannister, who held her in his arms.  
"I am. Sorry, that it took too long. I'm a slow walker these days," he told her with a low voice, still holding her in his lovingly embrace.  
"I know the both of you were waiting eagerly." Brienne could hear the amused tone in his voice, which caused her to look up to him. "Both of you?" She asked curiously.  
"Our daughter just happened to be at the harbor as I arrived," he explained to her, and she finally was able to show him a smile.  
"She'd been waiting there every day since your letter arrived," she said, still enjoying his embrace. For such a long time she'd missed this, missed him and everything about him. Now they probably would be able to have time on their own.  
"She told me, don't know where she got it from, but she's a great talker, don't you think?" He asked with amusement and love in his voice which caused Brienne to smile again.  
"She is wonderful, isn't she?" Never in her whole life, Brienne had thought herself as a mother, but she realized, she enjoyed it more than most things.  
"She is," Jamie answered and kissed her forehead first, then, softly, her lips.  
"Is missed you Brienne of Tarth," he said then, and suddenly, Brienne felt tears burning in her eyes.  
"I missed you too, Ser Jaime," she whispered in a hoarse voice, looking in his eyes. She saw so much love for her in these, it made her speechless. Brienne would never have imagined that both of them would genuinely have a chance. And now, that Cersei Lannister was dead, they could be together without being afraid.  
They kissed each other again, still holding each other's embrace, enjoying their company. They only walked inside to sit down on Brienne's bed, for she knew Jaime needed some rest, he was exhausted, she could see it written all over his face. So they just laid down on her bed, snuggling up against each other. Brienne leaned her head against Jaime's chest, listening to his steady heartbeat, while he caressed her upper arm.  
Tomorrow, there would be enough time to talk about what happened to them, after they'd lost each other in the great war. Tonight, Brienne and Jaime would just enjoy to finally be together, the feeling of each other. They would stay awake for a long time, kissing each other, sharing a few loving words. Later, their daughter would join them for the night. They would welcome her in their arms. They would enjoy being together, listen to Joanna's stories, so she and her father would be able to get to know each other better. Brienne enjoyed every second of being together with Jaime and Joanna - with her family.  
At one point all of them fell asleep, snuggled up to each other.


	17. Chapter 17

**Jaime**  
It had taken Jaime a few days to get back on his feet after the long journey from the North to Tarth. He'd slept a lot. He hadn't been in the physical state for such a long trip, but he felt like it had been worth it. All he'd wanted for a long time was to be reunited with Brienne...and his daughter he could name like this. He couldn't remember ever feeling so good. Even if his leg still hurt - would hurt for a long while - he was able to enjoy his time at Tarth. Like he'd imagined a few years before when he had seen the island from a distance, it was gorgeous all around here. Funnily, it felt more like home like Casterly Rock had ever done.  
He spent most days with Brienne, Joanna, and Selwyn. Most people didn't trust him first, but the more time he'd spent with Selwyn, the more people showed kindness towards him. It wasn't just the island that was special, the folks living here were that too.  
Jaime felt parts of him healing, he hadn't thought that need to recover. He got stronger with every passing day, and after a few weeks, he felt more like himself again like ever before. Jaime felt like he could smile again, even the memory of his sister faded away more and more.  
He wasn't sad about it.  
Jaime's future was Brienne.  
It had ever been her and no one else.  
He had a family now, and today, he would propose, because he wanted to call her his wife. He'd talked to Selwyn yesterday, and he'd given his blessings. Brienne's father was more than thrilled that she finally found someone who loved her like she deserved it. And Selwyn couldn't care less that it was him, Jaime Lannister, who'd captured Brienne's heart. Jaime was relieved in every possible way. And nervous. He knew Brienne wouldn't want something pretty romantic and Jaime wanted to make it all about her. He would propose to her in silence. Just the two of them.  
So, he invited her on a trip. Selwyn had suggested they could spend the night in one of his farmhouses on the cliffs of Tarth and Jaime had agreed immediately.  
Podrick had brought some supplies in there earlier, so they just could spend the day out there, riding, talking.  
"Thank you for doing this with me," Brienne told him, as they were riding side by side. "I haven't done this for a long time."  
"You're welcome. I'm glad also. Spending time with you is just what I need today. We have a whole day, where do you want to go?"  
"I don't care. Let the horses take the lead," Brienne answered. She was so relaxed around here. Jaime hadn't seen her like this since he got to know her. It was much appreciated to see her calm and relaxed.  
They hadn't had much time to talk, with Joanna always around them. Not that he didn't like, having her around, he loved that little girl from the moment, she'd greeted him on the harbor the day he'd reached Tarth. But spending time with Brienne was essential for him, too.  
"Alright, but I have a surprise in the evening," he answered, smiling.  
"A surprise? What kind of surprise?" Brienne asked promptly, she wasn't someone who loved surprises. Too many people had made jokes about her. But Jaime knew she trusted him, so he kept smiling.  
"A surprise, my love, is something, the person who's getting surprised isn't supposed to know," he answered with one of his brightest smiles as he looked in her direction. Brienne snorted at this answer.  
"I know what a surprise is. Can you give me a hint at least?" She asked him with a curious voice.  
"That's something I can do, my Lady. We'll stay overnight!" Jaime answered, grinning from ear to ear and broke into a gallop with his horse. He hadn't felt this free for a very long time and just enjoyed his time with Brienne. She followed him, was right behind him and together they had the most beautiful day. Brienne showed him many places that made him love Tarth even more.  
In the evening they made their way to the farmhouse, Podrick had prepared for him and Brienne. Jaime was relieved that he had this young man around. As they walked into that farmhouse, Brienne made a surprised gasp, and even Jaime was speechless for a moment. Podrick had made it really cozy for the both of them. Enough food and wine for many days were prepared for them, and he had even managed to get a warm fire in the fireplace. Soft blankets were laying on the bed and clothes to change in the cupboard. This young man had thought about everything. Jaime smiled and looked at the woman he loved so much. She was beaming just like him, because of the sight in front of them.  
"You did that?" She asked him, surprise in her voice and he nodded.  
"I had a little help. Your father showed me that farmhouse and Podrick brought all the things over here we would need," he explained, and she nodded in understanding.  
"Thank you," she turned her head and smiled at him. Jaime took her hand.  
"Everything for you, my Lady," he answered and walked with her to the already prepared table. Podrick must have left the cabin just minutes before they had arrived, Jaime thought as he helped Brienne to sit down. He sat down in front of her and poured each of them a glass of wine. They ate together while they kept talking. There were many things to talk about. What had happened after they'd lost each other in the Great War? Who'd helped them? The death of Tormund Giantsbane was a great topic. Jaime knew Brienne hadn't loved him, but she'd been grateful for the man's help and Jaime was that too. If it hadn't been Tormund, Jaime would already be dead for a long while now. Jaime told her, where he was buried, which relieved Brienne. At least, Tormund had found a piece of earth where he would have his last rest.

* * *

 **Brienne**  
She'd enjoyed the whole day, spending just time with Jaime, talking about everything that had happened while they'd been apart. Also, spending time in silence with him, like they did right now. They sat in front of the warm fire, enjoying the heat that was coming from the fireplace, while they were holding hands. It felt so natural to her, to be together with Jaime. Her father often had talked about soulmates. How her mother had been his. And even if Brienne hadn't believed in something like this before, she now thought that Jaime was precisely that...her soulmate. He hadn't been from the beginning of their journey. Seven hells, no! If she hadn't vowed to bring him to Kingslanding, Brienne had killed that man, to just shut him up. But he'd changed so much over the time they'd spent together that she almost forgot how he was before. Arrogant and self-regarding. There was nothing left of the man she'd met so many years ago, sitting in the dirt as a prisoner of Catelyn Starks son. But they've grown together somehow and even found love in each other. Jaime had been Brienne's first man, he would be her last man too. She wouldn't have another man on her side, just him. She loved him with all her being, and she knew he loved her likewise. Jaime showed it in everything he did when they were together. He reached out for her hand when she was close to him. Caressed her back when they stood together, talking with someone. Held her in his arms when they fell into sleep. Never, Brienne of Tarth had thought, she would find a man who was able to love her, just the way she was. She knew better now and was glad to have this experience. Also, she'd never thought she would want something like this. Cuddling, kissing and all that stuff. But she learned about herself more and more. Honestly, Brienne craved for his touch, for being close to him. Even being a mother was better than Brienne ever thought. Joanna was such a lovely little girl, and Brienne loved her and Jaime's daughter beyond words.  
While they sat together in silence, Jaime shifted a little to get something out of his pocket. Brienne looked at his direction, just to see the most nervous expression on his face. What had changed?  
"Jamie?" She asked, and he showed her a nervous smile.  
"Brienne. There is something I want to ask you. Now that I'm back, that we're together, I think it's time for the next step."  
Next step, next step...what did he mean? Brienne was confused beyond words and just stared at the man in front of her. She really didn't know what to ask now. Jaime, somehow always realizing when she was confused, smiled again and took both her hands in his.  
"Your father wanted me to do this in front of all his fellows, but I didn't think you would be comfortable with it, so I chose to do it tonight, here in that farmhouse. I wanted you to be relaxed and that you are...are you?" he asked her. Brienne only nodded in response. Somehow she knew, what was about to come, but she hadn't thought about it. Never even imagined that a man would want to marry her. And here he sat, at her side, holding her hand in his own, and about to propose. Brienne turned her head to look at him with a mixture of nervousness and amusement.  
"Alright. You know Brienne, I want to do everything right, I want to make you happy. You saved my life, you hold it in your hands. All these years ago, I never thought, I would learn anew what love, true love means, but you showed it to me. You kept me strong, even if you weren't with me, you didn't make me lose hope. And I have to thank you for that. If I hadn't met you, I wouldn't be here anymore."  
"Jaime...," she tried to stop him, but Jaime wouldn't let her, he needed to say all these things that made her blush but also made her feel so loved and special.  
"No, Brienne, honestly. I'm grateful for everything that happened to me since we've met. You made someone out of me, I'm actually able to like, and that's more than I ever imagined. You made the man of honor of me I always wanted to be."  
"I haven't done anything." Again she tried it. She didn't feel like she was the reason for his change. Brienne had just been herself all the time. It was nothing, really nothing special.  
"Don't talk yourself out of it. It's been you all the time. And I'm the luckiest human being for knowing that you love me. That you gave birth to our child and protected it when I couldn't. Brienne you are the love of my life, and I can't think about being apart from you anymore. I want you at my side, I want you to call my wife. And that's why I'm asking you: do you want to marry me?"  
There it was. The question. Brienne stared at Jaime like he'd been grown three heads. He really had asked her. Nervous as he was, he stared right back at her. Surely waiting for a response. But Brienne had lost her ability of speech. It felt like an eternity until Jaime spoke again.  
"Brienne?" He asked her, tenderly caressing her hand. Jaime knew just what she needed. Brienne snapped back into presence, taking a deep, calming breath.  
"I'm sorry...I want to...really. But have you thought about it twice? I mean...," again, Jaime just knew what she needed. He'd told her he loved her earlier but she needed proof, and that was, what he would give her. Jaime let go of her hand and cupped both of her cheeks. Only seconds later, he pressed his lips against hers in a tender kiss, which would grow more and more passionate.  
"I love you, more than words can say, more than I would ever be able to describe, Brienne of Tarth," he panted between two kisses, pulling her into his arms like she'd belonged there.  
"I don't need to think about it twice. You are the woman I want at my side, the woman I truly love. And I ask you again. Be sure, I wouldn't ask you if I weren't sure. And that I am for many years now. Do you want to marry me?"  
Brienne felt her eyes burning with tears, but she refused to let them go. He really wanted her, Brienne of Tarth at his side. She couldn't be happier right now. So, there was only one answer to give. "Yes. Yes, I want to marry you, Jaime Lannister!"


End file.
